Page 55 of All We Want for Christmas
Jazz held up her crossed fingers. She wasn’t aware that Lara had been pregnant when she and Rob had split up. That was too personal a secret to share yet – if ever – and Lara certainly didn’t want to be a cloud of gloom, especially on an evening that was meant to be devoted to relaxation and fun.
The village hall had no showers, so the only option was to spritz themselves with body spray and put on jeans, clean T-shirts and hoodies. It wasn’t ideal but they hadn’t exactly been running a marathon. Most of the class members had headed straight home, but there were still a couple of regulars in the cloakroom, also changing.
Lara peered in the mirror to put on some lip gloss.
Jazz frowned at her from behind.
‘What’s up?’ Lara asked, lip gloss wand in hand.
‘Nothing. The opposite, in fact. You look glowing.’
‘Do I?’ Lara laughed and turned round. ‘It’s my sweaty post-Zumba look.’
‘No. It’s not only the Zumba. You have an inner glow. You have for the past few days now. Your eyes are shining and you look happy.’
‘Compared to my usual harassed frown, you mean?’
‘You rarely look harassed. Though I think you hide the stress well. You’re the Miss Cool, Calm and Collected of the Castle.’
More like Miss Panic, Lara thought, remembering the state she’d been in over the chalice. ‘But thanks. I do feel life’s on the up.’
‘Is there a specific reason?’
‘I—’ she was about to say no, but realised that Jazz deserved her honesty. Besides, Lara was bursting to share. ‘Come on, let’s freshen up and I’ll tell you at the pub.’
The Fellside Inn was nothing special but it was cosy and welcoming, and they passed it on Jazz’s way to Ravendale, where she would drop off Lara before heading to her own house in a village a few miles further on.
Because of the route, Jazz usually drove, which gave Lara a chance to relax over a drink. She decided to try the pub’s ‘homemade’ mulled wine and took her glass and Jazz’s elderflower cordial back to the table. The pub was quiet midweek but there was a fire crackling in the hearth and the beams were adorned with fairy lights.
Lara sipped her wine and felt her limbs relaxing very pleasantly.
‘So, what’s the secret behind the inner glow?’
‘I think you might have guessed, but before I tell you more, please promise me that you won’t let on to anyone. Flynn and I – we’re such an early days thing that I’ve no idea if it will last or what. I feel I’m tempting fate by even telling you that we’re – well, I don’t know what we are.’
‘Wow! You’re having hot sex with the hot biker guy?’
‘Jazz!’ Lara squeaked. ‘Please, please don’t say that in public. Or at all.’
‘Why not if it’s true?’ Jazz asked with a cheeky grin. She did lower her voice however. ‘I’m very happy for you. Both of you. He seems a nice, decent guy and he’s hot. And I haveto apologise, as I feel like a total cow now for passing on that stupid gossip. I should have known better.’
‘It’s OK. I’d have done the same, if our roles had been reversed. I know you didn’t mean it maliciously and you’d no idea we were – interested in each other.’
‘That’s very generous of you. Oh, this is so exciting for you, Lara.’
Lara nodded, wanting to grin from ear to ear but still cautious. ‘I didn’t think it was fair to keep you in the dark. We’re having to skirt around each other and pretend there’s nothing going on. I don’t want to be the centre of attention and Flynn definitely doesn’t. Also, I can’t shake off the worry that I’ve gone and done something I swore I’d never do.’
‘Oh … what’s that, then?’
‘Date a work colleague. After Rob, I swore never to do it again, because the fallout is just so huge.’
‘Only if it goes wrong.’
Lara sighed. ‘Yes.’ She also could have added that she’d also been determined not to fall for any man who wasn’t willing to make her a priority in his life.
The fire glowed in Jazz’s brown eyes. ‘And he’d be the one who’d be out on his ear, not you. He isn’t the lord of the manor here. You’re top dog: he’d have to go.’
‘He said that too, but … I don’t want anyone to have to leave. Even by getting together, the risk is that both of us could get hurt and he’d probably end up quitting.’
