Page 57 of Moving to Love
He watched Joci move around the kitchen. He was at a loss for words. He decided to go back to the shop and let her have some time to herself. He kissed her on top of her head and told her he would be home at five o’clockish and left the house.
Joci didn’t know what she wanted to do. She had lost her enthusiasm for finishing the video for the Veteran’s Ride. She didn’t feel like unpacking boxes. Quite frankly, right now she felt like packing up and going back home. Maybe that’s what she would do—go home.
* * *
Five hours later, Joci’s phone rang. She wiped her hands on a towel and picked it up, without looking at who was calling.
“Hello?”
“Where are you?” Jeremiah’s voice was tight.
“I’m at home.”
There was a long silence. “No, you aren’t. I’m here—and you aren’t. It doesn’t look like you’ve been here all afternoon. Where are you?”
She could tell he was trying to keep it light, but the tightness in his voice was a dead giveaway.
Joci sighed. “After you left for the shop, I decided to come home and clean up a little.” Her voice grew soft. “I didn’t feel like staying there any longer.”
Jeremiah sucked in a big breath. There was silence on the other end of the line while he tried to control himself. Joci looked at her kitchen, which was as clean as a whistle right now, and leaned against the counter.
With as much lightness in his voice as he could muster around the fear and tightness, Jeremiah said, “This is your home now, Joci.”
Joci closed her eyes. She couldn’t say anything.
“Are you coming home, baby?” Jeremiah was on the verge of smashing something. He hated that just when he thought they had moved so far forward, they were moving backward again. He was going to have to tell her about LuAnn. He could hear Joci sniffling over the phone. Goddammit. “I’ll come and get you,” he said around a tightness he thought would choke him right off.
“No…I’ll be there in a few minutes.” Her voice was so soft he barely heard her.
Chapter 22
Joci pulled into the driveway. The garage door was open, and Jeremiah was pacing. He turned and moved aside as she pulled in. He ran over, opened the door for her, and pulled her out of the car. Without saying anything, he took her hand and walked into the house. As soon as they were inside, he slapped the button on the wall to close the garage door and then drew her into the living room. He sat on the sofa and pulled her down next to him. He looked into her eyes for an impossible amount of time, trying to gauge her reactions.
“Tell me what was going on today. With you. With why you felt the need to leave here.”
She grimaced, unsure how she should answer. She licked her lips, trying to form the thoughts to answer that question.
“Were you leaving me?” His voice cracked.
Softly, so softly, he almost didn’t hear her, she murmured, “No. I needed space from you. I didn’t want to unpack anything else because that felt permanent. I wasn’t feeling very permanent after you walked out. You know if I can’t trust you, it will never work. If you can’t talk to me, I can’t trust you. We have a real problem here.”
Jeremiah closed his eyes for a moment and pinched the bridge of his nose. He swallowed hard and opened his eyes to look at her.
“Yeah. That’s what I thought. Not at first. At first, I thought you had left me. But you didn’t take anything with you, so then I figured you needed some space.”
He got up and went to get a beer from the refrigerator. He looked at Joci to see if she wanted anything; she shook her head no. He walked back into the living room, sat next to her on the sofa, and turned to look at her.
“LuAnn’s brother, Lance, was my best friend. We went to high school together. We went into the Marines together. We were inseparable. We managed to keep ourselves stationed together and then deployed together. I loved him like I love Dayton, Tommy, and Bryce.”
His voice cracked. Joci’s heart swelled for him. She figured there was going to be a sad ending to this story. She reached forward and took his hand in hers.
“Lance’s parents died when LuAnn and Linda—their sister—were young. A lot like you and Jackie. Lance looked after them. Made sure they were safe. But he wanted to be a Marine so damn bad; we both did. So, he told them he had to go, but he would be back. An aunt and uncle watched over the girls. They were already in high school by that time, so it wasn’t like he was abandoning them. But he always knew when we were finished in the Marines, he would come back and finish taking care of them. He sent his checks home to them and called them all the time. He really loved them. By that time, Barbara was pregnant with the boys. Lance and I knew that, at least for me, my time in the Marines was almost over. I was coming home. Then we were deployed to Iraq.”
Jeremiah took a long pull off his beer. His chest heaved as he drew in a deep breath.
“We were under fire. It was horrible. It was chaotic, and we couldn’t see anything. The sand was always blowing, and the buildings are the same color as the sand. We couldn’t see shit, and we couldn’t hear shit because of all of the gun and mortar fire. My unit huddled behind an overturned vehicle to reload our weapons. We were mapping out our plan when Lance heard the sound of an incoming grenade. He threw me down on the ground and then lay over me to protect me.”
Jeremiah’s eyes welled with tears. He took a deep breath. His voice was very quiet. “He didn’t make it,” he choked.
