Page 12 of Choosing My Happiness
“I don’t want Blaze knowing I’m coming.” The humor was out of my voice in that sentence.
I heard her huff.
“Ok, no driver. Just get here safely. And keep me updated. I want check-ins, and I’m putting you to bed the minute you arrive. I’ll get the boys to keep an eye out for you,” she conceded.
I agreed and then pulled out of the driveway of my apartment block and headed home.
I took the shortest route, in the longest time, checking in with Janie at every stop. I eventually regretted saying no to that driver. But the independence in me was strong these days. Eventually, I finally pulled into the driveway of Bull’s new house. It was a 6 bedroom ranch style house set on a large block. Kids bikes and toys littered the yard.
Janie ran out to greet me with a big hug. Motherhood suited her so much, and I finally got to meet all the other children. Eric looked a lot happier. He had looked a lot younger than his 8 years on that hospital bed, but now I could see his fire. The arm looked like it was setting well. He dragged forward his biological brother, Trey, who was 6. Trey was obviously his brother’s shadow.
Then came Estella, orStella. She was Hispanic, and Manny’s older sister at 4 years of age. And the fifth child was an African American girl with gorgeously decorated corn rows.
“Hi, I’m Daisy two.” She held up 2 fingers as she said that. “Everyone calls me D2…because I got two moms.”
I crouched down to her. “Really?” I asked, glancing up at Janie who was smiling sadly.
“Yep, my real momma is in hospice care, and our adopted momma is here…and she looks after real Momma when she can.”
“Wow, you are really lucky D2,” I said to her. She grinned so brightly and then ran to grab another child. This 3 year old red-headed boy looked at me with soulful blue eyes and a face shape that I was all too familiar with. I’d married someone with a face like that, and as far as I knew, he had no siblings. Which meant that this was Blaze’s child.
D2 was oblivious to the sudden tension in my face.
“And this is Dylan Blaze Lovelace. He don’t have no Momma cause she died.”
Janie looked horrified. “When did you arrive, Dylan? Does your dad know you’re here?”
He nodded shyly and sidled up to her. “Granny’s at the doctors,” he stage-whispered.
“Ok Honey, you’re all good. I’m just going to give your dad a call to check.” She stepped away and called. She didn’t even say hello. She just launched into a tirade. “Did it ever occur to you to ask if you could drop your son off? I have a family and obligations!”
She listened to the response. “Uh huh, so it was an emergency for them. You still had time to call.” She sighed heavily. “No it’s okay, he’s here now. But you’ve been a single dad for 3 years Blaze. Time enough to get your act together.”
She hung up and glared at me. “He’s still a spoiled child sometimes.” She shook her head and bit back what she was going to say next. I used every bit of restraint to not hop back in the car and drive home straight away. I think Janie knew because she took away my choice.
“Alright children, let’s help Missus Daisy unpack her car, and show her to the guest bedroom.”
She picked up Manny as she spoke, and the children all screamed and ran for my car, even Blaze’s child.
“I’m sorry, I would have said no if I could,” Janie spoke quietly to me after the kids had settled me in and then ran out to play.
“Who is his mother?” I asked.
“One of the town girls. Ten months after you left, she came knocking on the clubhouse and handed him the birth certificate and the baby. Then she walked into the river and shot herself. Perez forced Blaze to do a DNA test and it came back that Dylan is his.”
I cupped my hands around the glass of ice tea she’d given me.
“Ten months. So he was conceived around the time that BJ died.” I looked up at her. Her face was furious as she nodded and huffed out a frustrated breath.
“He is being raised by just about every ol’lady here, seeing as his father drops him off to whoever will take him if the daycare is closed. They love him to bits. I just don’t like his father for some fucking solid reason…and neither does Perez or Midwife.” She looked sad when she admitted the last sentence.
“Everyone else still puts up with his bad behaviour.” I guessed, closing my eyes. “Listen, I’m here to see my dad before it’s too late. Then I’m going back on Monday. So it’s none of my business, really, is it?”
Janie looked at me. “Isn’t it? You’re not an ol’lady anymore? Did you get divorced and I don’t know about it?” she asked.
“No, I’ve been too busy getting a life. Probably time to organize it.” I sighed, raising the truth of it. I’d gotten my qualification and was earning enough to take care of myself. I was ready to cut the ties that were stopping me from moving forward.
“Might be a good time to do it. While everyone’s here.” She winked as she took a sip. I sighed and changed the subject.
