Page 20 of Who's Saving You
“Yeah, actually, I do. She’s doing a piece on me, probably why she was here, trying to catch my blooper reels for her article.”
He shakes his head, waving me off. “Everyone has a bad game. You redeemed yourself,” he says, tossing his towel onto the bench and grabbing his bag. “I’m heading out. I'll catch you at the field on Tuesday.”
We clap hands, and he walks through the crowd of people who are all still milling about.
“You redeemed yourself.”
It echoes in my head the same way Jameson’s ‘fraud’ comment does, and when I catch Noelle across the room interviewing another player, I can only hope there’s redemption if she gets the story she’s looking for. Because it will be just as dangerous for her as it is for me if any of this gets out.
~~
I grab a car back to the hotel we’re in for the night before the team hops a plane home tomorrow. I dropped all my shit in my room, but I’m anxious. I need to walk, tomove, and clear my head to try to make sense of it all. I wander the halls for what feels like hours, but when I check my watch, it’s only been forty-five minutes. I can’t even relax and go watch the rest of the games in the bar downstairs. I’ll let Dante handle all that for now.
Eva: Saw the game. You okay?
I close my eyes as the text from my sister comes in. I should have known she’d reach out, but I don’t want to talk to anyone right now.
Me: No, but I will be
Eva: You’ll be fine, Warrior
Her calling me Warrior calms me. She first said those words to me on draft night. It’s become a thing when I’m down; she could always sense when I was feeling the pressure.
My mind won’t stop playing tricks on me. Jameson called me a fraud. He meant it as a joke, but he’s right. It’s what I am—a fraud and a liar. I walk the halls until I come back to stand in front of the door to my room and stare at the number on the door. I stare at the stupid wallpaper pattern on the wall. And then anger begins to creep up because how dare Rhett walk back into my town,myclub? I’m angry that Noelle is pushing for something she doesn’t have a clue about.
I feel it start from my toes, swirl in my stomach, and work up my spine until my mind is screaming. I slam my palm against the wall, hit it over and over again with the heel of my hand, before I lean both forearms and my head on the wall, trying to calm down.
I breathe deep a few times before my senses pick up that I’m not alone. I turn my head, peering over my arms that are still pressed against the wall. I huff a laugh as Noelle steps closer to me.
Of course she’s here.
“You think I’m a fraud, too, don’t you?” I ask, and she shakes her head no. “You should.”
“I think you’re trying really hard to be the saint they all want you to be,” she says. “That’s not the same thing.”
I laugh again. “You’re better at this than I thought.”
“Better at what?”
I finally turn and meet her head-on. We’re closer now. She’s made a few steps closer to me, and I don’t know who moves first, but suddenly we’re standingtoo close, and I can almost hear the sound of our heartbeats bouncing off the walls.
“You don’t get it. I’m not who people think I am.”
“I know that,” she whispers.
My mind is frazzled. I don’t know what it is about her that makes me want to talk to her. Her gaze drops to my lips so quickly I wonder if I really saw what I just saw. It feels like a dare. I reach out, fingertips barely brushing the side of her jaw.
She takes a breath and holds it. I see her chest rise as she waits for me to make a move. And when I see it, I drop my hand and pull back fast. I can’t get burned by this chick.
“I can’t,” I croak out. “Not like this.”
She nods, then says, “You don’t have to be a saint for me to see you.”
I close my eyes. I’ve never had a woman focus so sharply on me, and I don’t know if it’s the story she wants or me. I step back, reaching for the hotel card to slide through my door. I unlock it and step in, without glancing back.
7
Flashback-Zeiders University - Sophomore year, 11:43 PM
