Page 109 of A Very Merry Enemy
“We are absolutely going to do this right now.” Jake moves closer, but his expression is gentler now. “Look, I’m marrying the love of my life tonight. And you know what I’ve learned from being with Claire?”
“What?”
“Life’s too short to play it safe when you know.” He puts his hand on my shoulder. “You’ve been in love with Holiday Patterson since you hit puberty. That’s two decades, Lucas. And you’ve spent a long fucking time waiting and wondering and wishing she’d come back.”
“I know how long it’s been.”
“Then why are you acting like this?” He squeezes my shoulder. “She came back. She’s here. She’s single. And every time you two are in the same room, it’s obvious she wants you just as much as you want her.”
I sigh. “It’s complicated.”
“Love is complicated. That’s what makes it worth it.” Jake steps back. “I’m not telling you to rush into anything. Just don’t waste any more years being scared of what might happen when you could be living the life you want.”
Hudson nods. “For once, I agree with Jake. You’ve been miserable. Just admit you’re crazy about her and do something about it.”
“I’m being respectful. Giving her space to figure out what she wants.”
“Has it occurred to you that maybe,” Jake says slowly, “she already knows what she wants? And she’s waiting for you to stop being so damn noble about everything?”
I think about the texts. The way she’s tried to restrain herself because I asked her to.
“I can’t be hers for a season again,” I say. “I won’t fucking survive it.”
Both of them go still.
“You think you’re a rebound?” Hudson asks, and his voice has lost all of its teasing edge.
“I don’t know. Her ex fucked her head up.” I run my hand through my hair. “She has a lot to work through.”
“Fuck that,” Hudson says. “Help her heal from it.”
Jake’s jaw is tight. “She needs you, Lucas. Pushing her away is the last thing you should be doing.”
The words hit like a punch because he’s right.
“Space is one thing. But her ex just arrived, and you’re like…let’s ignore one another?”
“It’s not like that.”
“No? ’Cause that’s what it looks like.” Hudson’s voice is firm now. “Seems to me like you’re the one who isn’t sure what you want. She came back for you, Lucas. That’s pretty fucking obvious to everyone.”
I stare at him, my chest tight.
“Agreed,” Jake says. “Now stop overthinking everything and just…be with her.”
“There are articles online about us.”
“And? There were articles about me and Hudson when we started dating the Manchester sisters. You’ll get over it. You’ll learn to ignore it. Build a fortress where the two of you can escape it all. And who gives a damn what anyone says or how it looks. Stop hiding behind needing space and being respectful, and just be honest with yourself,” Jake says. “You deserve to be happy, too.”
“Yeah? And what if what I want scares her off? What if she runs back to Paris, and I’m left here to pick up the broken pieces alone again?”
“Then at least you tried.” Jake adjusts his jacket. “But I’d be willing to bet that she’s been waiting for you to stop holding back just as much as you’ve been waiting for her to come home.”
Hudson claps me on the shoulder. “Plus, you look good today. Use it to your advantage.”
I let out a rough laugh. “You’re both terrible at pep talks.”
“We’re excellent at pep talks, you’re just a stubborn asshole who thinks he knows it all.” He claps me on my shoulder again. “Now come on. We have a wedding to get to, and you have a woman to impress.”
