Page 81 of Slaughtered Firefly
Thrust.
My insides screamed as his dick dragged across my walls. The forced fucking was slamming me against the wooden armrest. He was too large for me to adjust; I couldn’t breathe. I didn’t want to be wet for him, but my body didn’t understand the difference. Too trained to enjoy pain, and relinquish to the brutality of others. I was so ashamed. Hearing his rage, his hatred for me snapped something in my mind. I couldn’t move any useless part of me despite how much I wanted to. My vision started to fade. The lack of oxygen cradled me like an old friend as my mind dipped into blackness.
Twenty-four years ago
“My little sunshine,we have to go now.” Momma’s voice was sweet and soft as she whispered in my ear. Waking up from my nap, I rubbed my eyes. A big smile lit my face; we were going onan adventure after all. I’d never been to Montana before. I heard there were these big giant trees and lots of wildlife in school. Momma said we might even find Penny’s cousins up there. I was so thrilled. I jumped into Momma’s open arms as she giggled, catching me.
“Momma, is it true that there are trees the size of the big buildings in the city?” I asked in wonder.
“Yes baby, trees so large they’d gobble you up!” She tickled my stomach and I escaped laughing. “Come with me, my sweet sunshine, Let’s get you packed and once we are done we will get some ice cream on the way!”
“Ice cream! Ice cream! Ice cream!” I chanted as Momma caught me and carried me towards the big rooms.
“You remember our plan right? No one can know that we are going, not even Daddy.” Her big blue eyes looked at me with that soft smile, and I nodded.
“But won’t Daddy be coming with us?” I asked as I fiddled with the loose red bow on Penny’s soft pink fur.
“Yes baby, but not right now. We want to make sure we give Daddy time to finish work and be on his way, But you know who else is going to be there?” She smoothed my hair and poked me in the tummy.
“Who?” I asked with big eyes as she set me on the bed next to the open bag.
“Uncle Ryan. He already told me about this amazing zoo they have that he’s going to take you too, doesn’t that sound like fun?”
“Yes, can Penny come too?”
“Of course baby, she’s coming too. Maybe we will find her a friend at the zoo too.” Momma had turned toward her closet, grabbing clothes.
“Zoo! Zoo! Zoo!” I called out as I jumped up and down on the bed. Momma had started moving items around and setting shoeboxes on the bed.
“Be careful sweetie, we don’t need you falling off,” she reminded as she dug around in her closet. I jumped up and down with Penny clutched in my arms. I could almost reach the ceiling if I could just get a little higher. I bounced higher.
Up.
Up.
Up — my foot slipped on one of the boxes.
I gasped as I slid down off the side of the bed, taking the boxes with me. “Whoops, Penny you should have been more careful,” I whispered into the toy’s ear as I got up from the spilled contents of the boxes. Momma was still deep in the closet; she hadn’t heard the boxes fall, and I set Penny on top of the nightstand. “Penny, you sit there while I clean up these boxes so Momma doesn’t put you in timeout for knocking it off the bed,” I disciplined the toy in the tone Momma would use. Of course, the toy just sat there, but I could swear she was giving me a sassy look. My tongue stuck out at her, returning the sass. I collected the papers that had spilled out. There were a lot of them, and they were heavy. I couldn’t read those big words yet, but they looked official. There was a box of pens that had slid off as well, and as I began picking them up, I came across a pen that had Momma’s name on one side. Pretty swirling letters that are in her favorite green. The pen was black with a rose on its casing, and Momma’s name made up the thorns; it was so pretty. The cap was the top of the rose. I turned it in my hand, admiring it, and I took the cap off. There was a golden rose underneath it. There was a button on the pen. It was one of those fancy pens that I always wanted when we went shopping. Momma had turned around now. The smile never felt my face as I readied to show her I found her special pen.
“Hey sunshi — ”
“Momma?”
My hand had pressed the pen’s button, and Momma looked down at me dazed. Her hand now on top of mine. Just as quickly, a smile appeared on her face.
“Momma?”
“Hey baby, let’s go ahead and get your night juice… I already poured it for you…It’s on the counter.” Her breath sounded strange, like she was having trouble breathing, but she kept her smile on her face.
“Okay Momma, I’ll go get it. I’m sorry Penny made a mess but I am glad we found your pen,” I went to walk out the door but then realized I forgot Penny.
Momma was clutching Penny in her hands, with an unwavering smile and optimism on her face. “Here you go baby, I love you.” She whispered the last words, leaning over to kiss me and hand me Penny.
“I love you Momma,” I took Penny and smiled, scolding the bunny for getting into paint again.
We made it all the way to the kitchen, and I took a large gulp of my juice. It tasted a little funny, but maybe Momma left it out of the fridge too long. When I got down from the stool, I had dropped Penny. There was a crash, or was that thunder? I felt really sleepy, and I barely dragged Penny along with me. We made it to one of the living rooms before I had to sit down. My eyes barely held open as Penny dangled from my hand.
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