Page 9 of The Holiday Fakers
No shit…
“You’ll have to tidy it up a bit. But don’t lose any of the energy. You know, she worked from a photo of you!”
Is this how people see me? No wonder I can’t find a boyfriend.
Stanley pushes the picture into my hands. “Congratulations!”
“Thanks,” I manage, my mouth dry.
“Put the printer job aside and work on this today,” he says, grinning. “It’ll be fun. Help take your mind off things.”
He leans in, like we’re part of some secret office clique. “Boss’s orders!”
Another rosy-cheeked smile, then he’s off, leaving me caught between a printer, a pen mascot, and the looming battle with my ex for my job.
“Areyou sure they’ll only keep one graphic designer?” my best friend, Mia demands over the phone that evening. “The other company will bring in their own clients, so they’ll need the extra resources when you merge. And surely,He-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Namedwill take a management position?”
I haven’t moved from my couch since I got home from work. I need to pee, and I’m starving, but my body feels too numb to move.
“I don’t know. Maybe?” My voice is drained of any energy. “Colin isn’t interested in the admin side of things. He really loves drawing, just like me. Do you remember how we met at that conference and bonded over a game of Pictionary?”
“Yes. All very cute, but he still had the gall to leave you for?—"
“No …” I groan. “I can’t believe I forgot his new girlfriend is the receptionist at his dad’s company.”
“That’s currently the least of your problems.”
“What do you mean?”
“Uh … Isn’t there another Colin-related issue you’re forgetting?”
A chill runs down my spine. Mia’s right. There’s something very important that’s been momentarily buried under the chaos of today. An elephant hiding in my one-bedroom that I can’t yet see.
“What you promised your mom?”
The elephant leaps out from behind the drapes and trumpets loudly.
Oh god.
I make a strangled sound as the full magnitude of the situation hits me.
A boyfriend.
I promised Mom I was bringing one home for Christmas.
“At least you never gave her Colin’s name.”
“I thought I’d have time to find a replacement,” I wheeze.
“You still can! I have faith!”
“What have I done?” I wail.
“Put other’s feelings before your own as per usual,” Mia says breezily. “And we all know what your mom’s like. The more her excitement grows, the harder it is to let her down.”
“But what am I going to dooooo?!”
“Okay. We need to prioritize here. Strategize. One problem at a time.”
