Page 101 of The Holiday Fakers
Lucky limps forward after us. It’s not fast, but it’ll have to do.
We move as quickly as we can back to the creek, stopping at the edge.
“I can carry Lucky, I think,” Piper says.
“No. If she wriggles, you’ll both fall.”
I’m reminded of that old riddle, the one where a man has to get a chicken, a fox, and a bag of corn across a river in a boat that can only carry two at a time, without leaving the chicken alone with the corn or the fox with the chicken.
“Does Lucky have a leash in your bag?” I ask Billy.
He nods.
“Tie Lucky up to that tree so she doesn’t try to follow,” I say. “Then we’ll both cross the creek. I’ll give Billy to you, then go back and carry Lucky across.”
“Got it.”
Piper ties up Lucky, who is now barking, not wanting to be separated from us, then follows me across the stream.
I swaddle Billy the best I can in my coat, and Piper holds him in her lap as I go back for Lucky.
The pup trembles violently as I carry her across the freezing river. I can’t lose her. I can’t lose Billy. So I draw on every ounce of strength I have left and keep going. I thought all the hours in the gym were for health and looking good on camera. I never thought this would be the scenario where it really mattered.
On the other side I put Lucky down and take Billy back into my arms. He’s quiet as we start moving again, and the stages of hypothermia go through my mind. I’ve got to keep him conscious. I’ve got to keep him talking.
“Billy! Stay awake, buddy.”
“I’m so tired.”
“I know, bud, but staying awake is the most important thing you can do for me right now. It’s part of the mission.”
“It is?”
“One hundred percent. You may not have found a yeti this time, but you’ve had one hell of an adventure, and you know what that means?”
“No.”
“The story about it has to be even bigger. Even wilder.”
I’m exhausted, and the snow seems deeper with every step. I’m out of breath, but I can’t stop talking. Billy feels like ice against my chest, and it terrifies me.
“So, guess what the coyote becomes?”
“I don’t know.”
“A bear! Come on, Billy, you gotta think big!”
“Brody!”
I turn to see Lucky on the ground, not moving.
Piper drops the bundle of Billy’s clothes and knapsack, then lifts the dog into her arms with a grunt.
“Can you manage the weight?”
“Just about,” she replies, staggering forward.
“The gorge is just up ahead. We’ll do what we did at the creek, okay?”
