Page 120 of Christmas off Script
Ella ran on the spot, punching the air like a boxer preparing to fight. ‘Yep. Bring it.’
‘That’s the Christmas spirit. Right, let me message Willow.’
A minute later, his sister appeared, snorting with laughter at what they were wearing. ‘Oh, my god! Do you know if you can even fit through the door?’
Leo exchanged a panicked look with Ella.
‘Hang on.’ Willow unlatched the second door of the pub. ‘Now give me thirty seconds to get the music going.’
She dashed back inside and Leo took Ella’s hand. ‘We’re the Noel it Alls. We’ve got this. Okay?’
She nodded. ‘Destroy all opposition. In a festive way, of course.’
The sound of ‘Eye of the Tiger’ by Survivor started playing and someone cheered.
‘Here we go!’ Leo yelled, then extended his arm. ‘Ladies first.’
Ella jogged up the steps to the doors, which were being held open by Willow and Connor, and Leo followed her into the pub to a chorus of whoops and whistles.
This year, Ella had constructed giant boxes to fit around them, which they’d covered in wrapping paper, bows and ribbons. They were walking presents nearly a metre wide, and not ideally suited to a pub that was hundreds of years old and filled with people on a Saturday night.
But Leo didn’t care. And seemingly, neither did Ella. No matter what she’d been through over the past few weeks, here she was, strutting through the pub like a prize-fighter crossed with a supermodel. Leo followed her lead, posing and singing along to the lyrics as they made their way through the main body of the pub to the back, where the quiz was taking place.
People in groups sat around small tables, dressed in Christmas hats and jumpers. Each group cheered and clapped as Leo and Ella arrived. All except for the Beardy Boys, who were rolling their eyes and shaking their heads.
Scott was wearing a t-shirt with a picture of a sexy Santa on it and the words ‘Women love a man with a beard’. Ryan’s t-shirt read ‘It’s the most wonderful time for a beer’, Tommy’s had the words ‘Dashin’, Dancin’, and Prancin’ till I get Blitzen’ on it, and Finn’s t-shirt was plain black with the words ‘This is my Christmas t-shirt’ in white block capitals.
Leo went straight to Finn’s side, twerking in his face until Finn pushed the giant box away, sending Leo stumbling forwards.
Ella caught him, then pointed at Finn. ‘Naughty step! I mean, you’re on the naughty list! You’re getting coal in your stocking this year.’
‘He needs it to warm up his grinchy-cold heart,’ Leo added, noting with glee that Scott, Ryan and Tommy were trying not to laugh.
The quizmaster, Derek, was dressed in an eye-wateringly garish jumper with lights embedded in the design that flashed every time he moved. He raised his hands. ‘Alright, alright. You haven’t won yet.’
‘Then why did I slip you twenty quid yesterday?’ Leo asked indignantly.
Derek grinned. ‘Finn gave me forty.’
‘What?’ Leo turned to Ella. ‘Is there anything left in the bribe kitty?’
She pulled a face. ‘Your sexual favours?’
Leo sighed loudly. ‘Okay…’ He made a move to climb out of his present box.
Derek held up both his hands. ‘No, thank you. Not now. Not ever.’
‘I wasn’t offering them to you,’ Leo replied, glancing towards the bar where Derek’s wife was pulling pints. ‘Janet! Fancy a ride on the Foxbrooke express in return for us winning the quiz tonight?’
Janet didn’t look their way but extended a middle finger in Leo’s direction, then made the gesture for ‘wanker’.
‘Rude!’ Leo cried, as everyone cracked up.
‘Sit down, you muppet,’ Derek said. ‘Now, are we all here?’
Leo took a seat opposite Ella, and they grinned at each other. Each year, they made sure they were the last to arrive so as to make the biggest entrance.
‘We’re waiting for one more,’ Finn said. ‘He’s just coming.’
