Page 40 of Wedding Games
There was a whistle in response and a faint cry.
Rory took out his radio and called Allison. ‘I think we’ve found them. I’m sending coordinates, and I’ll confirm as soon as we’ve got eyes on them. It’s a gully so we might need an assist if they’re injured.’
‘Roger that,’ Allison replied. ‘We’ll stand by.’
The men secured their packs, tightening every strap, then scrambled down the steep sides. The rocks were loose, and there weren’t many handholds. Small trees had grown up from the cracks. Rory pulled on a few, testing to see how much weight they could take. At the bottom was a rushing stream. It wasn’t particularly big, but the water was being forced through a narrow gap creating bubbling froth as it tumbled over and around the boulders.
‘Arnold! Brad!’ Rory yelled again.
‘Rory?’ a voice answered.
In the distance, behind a huge rock, they spotted the fingertips of one waving hand.
Thank god.
‘Stay put!’ he called out. ‘We’re on our way.’
They picked their way forward, occasionally having to dunk themselves in the icy stream to make progress. When they reached the rock, they clambered to the top and looked down over the other side. There, naked and covered in mud, were Arnold and Brad.
‘Dudes!’ yelled Brad. ‘You found us!’ He held out his hand, on which sat what looked like rabbit droppings. ‘Want some berries?’
Rory clamped his jaw shut to stop it from falling open. The men had removed their clothes and were attempting to use them for other purposes. Each man had a shirt tied around an ankle with a branch poking out the top. Their trousers had been tied together to create a canopy that was about as effective as spaghetti, and their jackets were lying on the ground. Suspended from a tree were a pair of silk budgie smugglers and a pair of striped boxer shorts.
‘What happened?’ Rory croaked.
‘We got a little lost,’ Arnold began.
‘No, man, nature needed us,’ Brad interrupted. ‘She called and we came.’
‘And we were a little parched after all the whisky,’ Arnold continued.
‘So, we dowsed for water,’ said Brad over the loud noise of the stream beside him. ‘And decided to rappel into the gorge.’
‘Rappel?’ Charlie asked, incredulously. ‘With what?’
‘Our pants,’ Brad replied.
‘Trousers,’ Arnold clarified.
Rory could no longer stop his mouth from dropping open. A couple of drunk toddlers had more sense than these two.
‘However, unfortunately it didn’t work quite as planned,’ said Arnold. ‘And we took a bit of a tumble. I did my left ankle in and Brad did his right.’
‘Two sides of the same coin, man!’ said Brad, fist-bumping Arnold.
‘So we’ve been putting our survival skills to the test,’ said Arnold. ‘Mud to keep the midges away, splints for our injuries—’
‘And we’ve been filtering water to drink!’ said Brad with excitement, pointing at the underpants hanging in the tree.
‘We’re the dream team,’ said Arnold.
Rory was positive he was in a nightmare.
‘Do you have a phone?’ Brad asked.
‘Yes,’ Rory replied, pulling it out. ‘Do you want to ring—’
‘Awesome, man! Can you get some pics for Instagram?’ He high-fived Arnold. ‘Hashtag-taking-on-nature-and-winning!’
