Page 77 of Kissing Games
‘Papá?’ Valentina said. ‘Soy yo.’
He squeezed her shoulder and left.
In the corridor,he slumped back against the wall, breathing heavily. Would the baby survive? Would Isabella? How would he feel if that happened to Tabbie? He had to ring his sister. He had to hear her voice. He scoured the castle for Rory, finally finding him as he drove into the back courtyard with Zoe.
He went to the driver’s side as Rory got out. ‘Can I borrow your phone?’ he asked, giving Zoe a brief wave.
‘Good morning to you too,’ Rory replied. ‘What do you need it for? Prank calling the Prime Minister again?’
Charlie shook his head. ‘I need to speak with Tab.’
Rory grinned. ‘And she won’t pick up if she sees your number? I’ll let you in on a little secret, mate. We all think twice about answering when we see your name come up on the screen.’
‘Ha ha. That’s half the reason. The other is that I’ve lent Valentina mine. Can I use the car to drive her into Inverness so she can get a new one?’
Rory pulled out his phone, unlocked it and handed it to him. ‘Sure. I’ll be in the workshop with the keys. Any news on Vlad?’
Charlie shook his head. ‘Fuck me, I’ve slipped him enough laxatives to give an elephant the shits. He must be flushing his food and eating something else. No one’s guts are that strong.’
Rory frowned. ‘He’s been down to the pub again, sniffing around the women and trying to buy drugs.’
‘You know, I’d quite happily take care of him permanently.’
‘Get in line, mate,’ Rory replied. ‘Get in line.’
Charlie tookRory’s phone into an old storeroom just inside the back door of the castle. He pulled a plastic chair off the stack in the corner and sat down, looking at his sister’s number. He took a big breath and dialled. She picked up after a couple of rings.
‘Hi, Rory.’
‘Tab, it’s me.’
Silence.
‘Tab, please don’t hang up. I really need to talk to you.’
The silence continued.
‘Tabbie?’
‘I’m still here.’ Her voice was flat. ‘What do you want?’
‘Tab, I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I’m sorry for being an annoying prick growing up. I’m sorry for being a surly bastard at your passing out ceremony. I’m sorry for getting drunk at your wedding and throwing up as you were leaving the reception with Miles.’
His words were tumbling out, tripping over themselves as he tried to think of the million things he had to be sorry for. All the things he should never have done. All the things he’d never apologised for at the time.
He gripped the phone. ‘I’m sorry for not making more of an effort with Miles. I’m sorry for leaving you to deal with Mum and Dad and for having to mop up my messes. I’m sorry for being distant, for not stepping up. I’m sorry for lying to you and for what I said on the phone. Tab, I’m so fucking sorry. My life has been one long series of fuck-ups and you’ve had to witness most of them.’ He paused for breath, his head bent, his forehead resting on his hand. ‘Tab, I know one phone call isn’t going to even begin to make up for the hurt I’ve caused you, but I want to be honest for the first time. I’ve lied to you and I’ve lied to myself for so fucking long now, and it’s got me nowhere.’ His chest was tight, his heart racing. He couldn’t breathe. ‘Tab?’
‘I’m here, Charlie. I’m not going anywhere. Take your time.’
His head was pounding as all the boxes in his mind opened at once and spewed out their contents. All the pain he refused to acknowledge or name was crashing through him at once. He was shaking now, his breath coming faster and faster.
‘Charlie!’ his sister yelled. ‘Hold your breath. Now!’
He followed her order, his head so light he was sure he would faint. His body and mind were screaming at him, but he tensed his muscles and screamed back. His heartbeat slowed and his head cleared. He let his breath go with a shudder.
‘You okay?’
He nodded, then remembered she couldn’t see him. ‘Yeah, thanks.’
