Page 85 of Love Notes & Lifelines
That shade of red is mine.
She shrugs but won’t meet my gaze. “Why do you care?”
“I… It’s turning your finger green,” I say lamely. She narrows her eyes and places a hand on her hip. This is her fiery position—one I’m partial to, if I’m being honest.
“You’re worried because it’s turning my finger green. That’s why you nearly broke my finger to get it off?”
“What?” I glance down. Shit. I am pinching her finger harder than necessary. I silently curse then release her hand. “I apologize.”
“For what?”
Is she serious? “For—for manhandling your fake ring.”
“The fake ring you’re worried about because it’s turning my finger green.” Her ire matches my own and it’s all I can do to keep my lips to myself.
“Yes. Now answer my question. Why do you have it?”
She rolls her shoulders and walks to the wall of windows. “I picked it up when I went home Saturday. I was going to sell it, but now I want to toss it into the ocean. Honestly, I was kind of hoping submerging it in the Atlantic would wash away some of the nightmares he still causes too.”
My heart gallops in my chest. “Do you trust me?” I ask in disbelief. After everything, she trusts me with at least one of her secrets. Relief crashes into me like a ten-foot wave.
“I want to,” she clarifies. “I wouldn’t have told you that if I didn’t.”
She has her own war going on inside her, and like me, she doesn’t let anyone in. Unlike me, I fear it’s because she doesn’t have anyonetolet in.
“Elijah’s all I have.”Her words have haunted me, and now the truth of them steals my resolve.
Her sadness shows in her guarded posture and her expression that could break anyone’s heart, but I get it now. Shetries to be everything to everyone without ever letting them in—she’s protecting her heart.
If they don’t know her, they can’t hurt her.
It’s not about trust with Stella. It’s about belonging in a world where good is never enough and love is tossed away like yesterday’s bread.
We’re a lot alike. My wounds sit fresh and deep in my soul, but now I have an uncontrollable desire to ruin whatever—whoever—hurt her so badly.
Doesn’t she know she could never blend in? She’s the diamond in a sea of coal.
“You’re not alone anymore, Stella.” Her hands tremble and the pain in her gaze is a visceral hit to my chest.
“Do you have a wedding date in mind?” Tabby yells, interrupting our moment.
Little feet slap against the hardwood floors and Emmy comes to a breathless halt in front of us. “A weddin’?”
Does she even know what a wedding is?
“Like Cindewella and her pwince?”
I guess she does.
My mouth opens and closes, but Stella drops to her knees so she’s at eye level with my niece.
“Well,” Stella begins, then searches my face for guidance. She’s the expert here, so I shrug. “Sort of like that,” she says when she turns back to Emmy, whose gaze dances with a million questions.
“Will you be my new mommy? Mommy said I’d get one and she said to be nice. But that’s easy ’cause I alweady lub you.”
Sweat blooms on my palms. I need to make an appointment for us all with a therapist as soon as possible. What the hell do you say to that? And what if things don’t work out with Stella and me? Will that just be another loss this little girl has to suffer through?
What if things don’t work out with Stella and me?
