Page 33 of Love Notes & Lifelines
“I had it in a basket and was moving her room to room while I put it away. But then I had to help Emmy with her hair, that was a nightmare by the way, and when I turned around, Ruby had dragged all her clothes into the hallway, probably with her teeth because they all had round wet marks the size of her mouth. I’mtoo damn tired to do anything about it, so they’ll stay there until the cleaning service comes.”
As that mental image sinks in, I don’t fight the smile that accompanies it. “I know it’s hard right now, but it will get easier.”
“It would be easier if you or Stella would just agree to be my nanny.”
Guilt closes my throat, and thankfully, he speaks so I don’t have to.
“I have them, now what do I do?”
Rolling my shoulders, I begin to pace. “Do they have feet attached?”
“Feet?” he asks. His voice is unnaturally high, and I envision him as a preteen.
“Do they have material that would cover Ruby’s feet, I mean.”
“Yes. They have feet.”
“Okay. That’s okay. What you need to do is get some scissors and cut the feet of the pajamas off. Then take them with Ruby to the bathroom and clean her up. After that, put her diaper on as normal, no duct tape, and then put these pj’s on her backwards so the zipper is in the back. She won’t be able to reach it that way, so her clothes will stay on.”
“Seriously?”
“Seriously. It’s that easy.”
“You always have the answer.” There’s a hint of awe in his tone that warms my body.
Elijah reenters the room, having composed himself, but I turn my back on him.
“I don’t always, but I try.”
There’s a beat of silence, then two.
“Thank you for talking me down and for helping me not step in poop again.”
“On the bright side, you must have gotten her to eat corn.”
His laughter finds its way through the phone and weaves around my heart like a tourniquet.
“That is a bright side for sure. Do you always find those too?”
My heart races uncomfortably and my armpits could use more deodorant. “That’s harder for me to do, unfortunately, but I wish I could.”
“Jane?”
“Yes, Beck?”
“Thank you.” It’s the most sincere thing anyone has said to me in a very long time and it cocoons me in an embrace I desperately need.
“You’re welcome. You know where to find me if you need me.”
“I do—No Ruby-roo, no! Get your hands out of your diaper.”
Ruby’s baby giggles are the last thing I hear.
I count to ten before I turn around because the weight of Elijah’s stare bores into my back.
“He likes you,” he finally says. “He doesn’t like many people, and he likes both of you.”
Sadness rips away Beck’s virtual hug. “He wouldn’t if he knew I’ve been lying to him. Don’t you feel guilty?”
