Page 162 of Love Notes & Lifelines
She stares out at the ocean and the mob of people putting together our reception for later today.
“This is the best day of my life,” she says with watery eyes.
When she falls into my arms, all is right with the world.
“Are the girls ready?”
She nods against my chest. “Emmy made a valiant effort to get Ruby into that pile of tulle, but she wasn’t having it. We compromised with a little yellow sundress.”
That draws a chuckle from me. “We should get going then before Ruby spills something on it.”
Stella squeezes me harder, and I do the same. I know she’s counting to ten before she releases me. Just like the love notes we leave throughout the house, physical touch is our talisman—it centers and calms and feels like home.
“I found it,” Emmy yells, bursting into the room. Stella mentioned once that she wanted to teach her to live loudly. I didn’t know what she meant at the time, but I do now. Emmy’s face is pure sunshine. The shadows that chased her have eased over the past year, and she’s no longer the little girl cowering in the corner.
She’s independent, and stubborn as hell—just like her mother. Both of them.
I smile and my heart rate picks up speed. It took six months for the case with Danica to come to a close, and six more months for us to settle into our new normal, but we’ve done it. We’re living proof that love is the secret to happiness.
Therapy has also helped. We all go individually to work on our specific trauma, then we go once a month for maintenance family therapy, and I’m grateful for it—we’re grateful for it.
“What did you find, lovebug?” I ask, crouching down in front of her.
She holds up a lavender sticky note that hasHayes Family Love Notesprinted across the top. Stella drew flowers and hearts around the name Hayes and under that it says,love from heaven, love from me, all around our family tree.
My throat closes up. Stella leaves love notes for the girls every day, and she usually finds a way to include Cally.
“I found mine too,” Stella says with a smirk, and I feel my cheeks heat.
My love notes to Stella are not safe for little eyes, and she calls me out on it in front of Emmy, knowing it’ll make me flush. But it’s not a lie. I can’t wait to fuck my wife tonight.
Stella sidesteps me and pulls Emmy into a hug. “This is my favorite one,” she says, caressing the little note in Emmy’s hand.
Emmy nods with a grin that takes over her entire face. “Tabby read it to me. Can we start now? I’m ready and I want to go make you a Hayes. Daddy, please can we start?”
We’ve lost the Beck in my name this year, and Stella is Mama thanks to Ruby. I glance over at the portrait we had painted of the girls with Cally and Davis. It’s moments like this that guilt hits me. Guilt that I get to be here—I get to be their daddy—and he doesn’t. But it’s a guilt that serves no purpose, so as I always do, I offer a silent prayer of thanks and a promise to keep them safe.
That’s when I notice Stella’s note to Cally. She leaves them near her picture sometimes, like a reminder of sorts. This one says,I promise to love and protect them with my whole heart—Stella, and I know she’s overcome with the same sense of guilt sometimes.
“Daddy!” Emmy scowls with her hands on her hips. “Pa-lease can we start?”
Ruby toddles in with Tabby following closely behind.
I scoop her up, and then kiss Emmy on the head. “Yeah, lovebug. We can go make Stella a Hayes now.”
She claps and runs from the room, and Tabby laughs, but it’s full of wild emotions.
Tabby fans her face. “I’m literally a month pregnant. I shouldn’t be this emotional.”
“You should be whatever you’re feeling,” Leo says, entering the room and hugging her from behind. His hands restpossessively over her belly. He lifts his gaze to Stella and me. “Elijah, Teddy, and Bella are here. You guys ready?”
“Oh, I’m ready.” I take Stella’s hand and tuck Ruby onto my hip. “Did she agree to move in yet?” I ask, winking at Tabby.
Leo frowns. “Not exactly.”
“What does that mean?” Stella searches Tabby’s face.
“Ugh, fine. I said we could tear down a wall that separates our apartments. Baby steps, you know?” she says with an annoyed shake of her head as we walk down the hall.
