Page 133 of Your Last First Kiss
Dragging my gaze from his, I stare straight ahead while I collect my thoughts.
“The thing is, life is all about choices. Only you can choose who you’re going to be. The opinions of others are none of your business.”
I hear a muffled chuckle and turn to face him.
“What? I saw it on a tea towel once. It stuck with me.” I shrug and rub my palm over my chest. Even the smallest smile from him makes my heart flutter wildly in my chest. “Your dad may have given you your last name, but it’s up to you what that’s going to mean. He chose to live in a way that brought shame to the name. You can be the one who makes it respectable again.”
He turns his head toward the damaged SUV and drops his sad eyes to the ground.
Remorse, that’s what I wanted from him. Remorse will lead him back to being the Kai that everyone loves. It means that the good kid is still in there. He was just muzzled by pain.
“I wasn’t mad at you. I was mad at…” he says softly.
“I know.”
He lifts his head to look at me, and I exhale a heavy sigh, then smile.
“I know,” I repeat. But I leave it at that. The feelings between a father and son in situations like this are tumultuous. Kai will have to decide on his own if he can forgive his father or if he has to forget him.
“Why did you do it?” he asks. “I was horrible. Why are you sitting with me instead of in the sheriff’s office?”
“One of these days, you’ll realize that I know what I’m talking about sometimes. I’m here because I said I would be. Not all men leave, and not all men break promises.”
He’s fighting back the tears, so I look away to give him some privacy.
“I love your mom, Kai. And I love you kids, too. You aren’t making it easy, but that doesn’t make it any less true.”
I hear him suck in a breath. “I know.”
It’s not exactly the declaration I was hoping for, but it’s a start.
“You’ll need to do an apology tour, you know?” I ask on a sigh, letting my head fall back against the wall.
“Yeah, I know. And Dillon, I am sorry about the SUV. Chase suggested it, and I don’t know. It just felt good to break something.”
I turn to him with a serious expression. “The next time you want to break something, or the next time you want to lash out at someone who loves you, you come here and lash out at that.” I point to the bag. “That is the only acceptable outlet for rage like this, do you understand? You have the opportunity to choose the right path. I hope you’re going to take it.”
“I’ll try.”
“And you’ll mess up,” I say. “But I’ll be right here when you do. If you could keep the mistakes to toilet papering houses or something less expensive, I’d appreciate it, though.”
He winces. “I don’t know how to pay for that.”
“We’ll get an estimate from Tanks, and then you’ll work off your share of it here.”
Kai nods, and it’s like I can see the noose he’s been wearing around his neck finally slip free.
“I am sorry, Dillon.”
“I know, kid. I appreciate that, but do you want the truth?”
He nods.
“The truth is, I was more upset that you let a Brandt in here. I grew up with friends who were more like family, and they taught me everything I know about love. It’s not the people you share DNA with that make a family. It’s who holds your heart when it’s breaking. It’s who stands by your side, even when you make a really bad mistake. And family is about loyalty above all else. You chose enemy sides, kid. That hurt.”
“You’re going to make us a family, aren’t you?” He sounds resigned, but not really unhappy either.
It’s so unexpected I laugh. “If I get my way, yes. I want to marry your mom one day, Kai. I want to go to your games and watch you graduate from high school. I want you in my life as much as I want your mom. I know that’s hard to understand, but it’s the truth.”
