Page 82 of One Little Kiss
Colton: It’s not 4000…only 2000 (crying laughing emoji)
Preston: WHY???
Sylvie: I think it’s a reminder to remove the stick from your ass every once in a while, son.
Preston: …
Halton: …
Dexter: …
Ashton: …
Colton: EPIC (laughing emoji, laughing emoji, laughing emoji)
CHAPTER25
WINNIE
“How do you feel?” Colton’s hushed words startle me out of my daze, and I blink feverishly.
“Ah, it’s a lot.” Glancing down at the twenty pages of notes in my lap, I close my eyes and rub my temples. “It’s a lot,” I repeat. I slump forward in the seat of Colton’s SUV, and his strong hand lands on my back, rubbing in soothing circles.
“It is.”
Wes laughs in the backseat, and we both turn to him. Buckled into his car seat with a pair of headphones Colton had specially made for him, he watches the small screen hanging from the ceiling. Another luxury I could never give him myself, but I can’t deny it made our trip to Boston much easier.
“I thought Dr. Hamilton was very thorough, and she gave us so much great advice. Most importantly, she gave us a starting point.”
As he speaks, my gaze drifts over the harried notes in my lap, each page with a different header.
-Sensory Processing Disorder.
-Neurodevelopmental disorder: look this up. What does it mean?
-Different from autism, but can present with similar characteristics.
-Vision: he has trouble tracking. Vision therapy is recommended.
-Speech delay: auditory over-stimulation, multiple ear infections. Confident he’ll catch up with therapy.
-He lives in a state of fight or flight. Sensory therapy is suggested and tools to minimize triggers.
It’s the last one that makes me tear up. How must it feel to live in a constant state of fight or flight? Regular stimuli that I deal with daily are magnified to an intolerable level for him, and I had no idea. Guilt makes my stomach turn like acid.
Colton leans over and places his palm on top of my notes. “There’s no way you could have known this, CC. But now we do, and we can take steps to help him. She even said, with the right therapies, he could outgrow or learn to tolerate most of these.”
Fear grabs my throat like a vice, and my words break on a sob. “C-Colton. There’s no way my insurance will pay for this stuff. I had a hard enough time getting them to pay for amoxicillin when he had his tenth ear infection. Maybe … maybe if I take on more hours? But then I’d have to find a babysitter and I don’t know that I’d make enough for it to even be worth it. Beth will help, but what about when she goes to—”
My notes go flying as Colton hauls me over the center console and into his lap. The horn blares as my ass rests on it, and he pulls me into him. My jaw nearly comes unhinged in shock as he grabs the sides of my face and draws me closer.
“Wendalyn,” he rasps. “I know you think you have to do everything yourself. I know you use your independence to ward off heartbreak. If you don’t trust anyone, they can’t let you down, right? I’m learning all your defense mechanisms, baby, and I’m not here to dismantle them. But I will help reinforce that you’re worth more than any dollar amount in my bank account. You’re worthy of love. You don’t have to prove how strong you are. I see it in everything you do. I’ll never take away your independence, but you need to let me in. Trust me when I say I’m here for the long haul. The good and the bad. I’m going to stand by you through everything if you’ll only let me. I know that every other male in your life has let you down, betrayed your trust in the most brutal of ways, but I’m not them. I will mess up. But I’ll never leave. I’m here for you and for Wes.”
I’m sitting in an expensive SUV on Colton’s lap with my legs draped across the center console and he just put Band-Aids over every insecurity I’ve ever had. Slowly, day by day, this man beneath me is healing my broken heart and building a fortress around us that feels safer than anything I’ve ever experienced.
“Please don’t hurt me, Colton.” My breathy words bleed every emotion I’m holding in.
Dragging my face closer, his lips ghost over mine. He makes me a promise with a single word. “Never.” Before I can respond, his mouth claims mine. It’s a brutal kiss of clashing teeth and intense promises. It’s a kiss that tells me I’m his, and a kiss that instills hope.
