Page 83 of The Beat of My Heart
Fuck me. Lifting my head to look into his eyes, I know I’m about to walk into hell for this man. “I’ll stand by you.”
Smiling, he says, “And I’m going to stand by you.”
Less than two hours later, I’m on a private plane for the first time in my life. A flight so full of fiery men I feel like I’m in the middle of a dirty movie because this cannot be real life. I met all the Westbrooks when they came to Vermont last time, but there’s so many of them I don’t even attempt to keep their names straight. They are all carbon copies of Preston, each with a slightly unique personality.
Curling into a ball in my seat, I try to sleep, but my mind is spinning. As much as my heart hurts living without Trevor, can I be with him? I have to put Charlie first. Right now, I don’t have any other options. We have to get Charlie and bring him to Lanie’s house. After that, though, I’m not sure what I’ll do. What kind of mother would I be if I stayed in a situation like this?
Grabbing AirPods out of my purse, I hear Trevor ask Dex, “Have you heard from Loki today?”
“No, why? Should I have? Is he involved in this?” Dex asks.
I turn on iTunes to drown out the answers and pray to God that Loki is okay. What kind of life could I give Charlie, raising him in a world where I have to pray regularly that one of our friends is alive?
* * *
I wakewith a start as we touch down on the runway in Vermont, but I don’t stay awake long. I’m vaguely aware of being lifted into the air and hearing Trevor say, “She’s exhausted. I’m surprised she hasn’t had more of a breakdown today.” My world then goes blissfully black and I’m again in a dreamland where mobs and guns and explosives don’t exist.
* * *
“Jules? We’re here,”I hear someone say. Opening my eyes, I suck in a breath. “Charlie,” I whisper. It takes only a second for the events of today to catch up with me. “Trevor, sorry. I-I…”
“It's okay, Angel. You’ve been through a lot. But we’re at your house, where are your keys?” he asks.
“Keys?” I ask him, then remember they don’t know how things work around here. “We don’t need keys for the house, I don’t even have locks.” Stepping out of the car, I hear a commotion and stick my head back inside the car. That’s when I notice the officer that was with us on the way back from the Outer Banks. “Ah, hey. What are you doing here?”
“Jules, this is Seth. He will be with us until we hear from Loki. As far as anyone needs to know, he’s a friend just like Preston or Dex,” Trevor tells me.
I have a bodyguard. It makes this situation that much more real, and I hate it. Having a bodyguard makes it impossible to pretend.
“Fucking hell,” I mumble.
“Good to see you too, ma’am,” Seth says dryly. “What do you mean you don’t have locks on your doors?”
“Just what I said, I don’t think this house has ever even had locks.”
“Julia,” Trevor scolds, “You live in the middle of the woods by yourself, how the fuck do you not have locks on your doors?”
“I don’t have locks because I know every goddamn person in this town,” I seethe. I’m looking for a fight, and I know it, but I can’t help myself.
“So, listen,” Preston cuts in, “I have to piss like a fucking racehorse. If there are no locks, you okay if I just let myself in?”
“Go ahead,” I tell him with my eyes trained on Trevor. “It's down the hall, first door on your left.”
“Thanks, sweetcheeks,” he says as he takes the front stairs two at a time.
Trevor and I are in a staring competition, neither budging until we hear Preston scream, and the reality of my situation rushes me like a linebacker.
Seth is at a dead sprint before I can move a muscle. Preston is backing out of the house, his hands in the air before Seth makes it to the porch. Preston is followed by the barrel of a shotgun. A shotgun I recognize. I’m stomping towards the house when I see Lexi step outside.
“What the fuck are you doing, Lexi?” I yell. I’m at my limit now. Watch out, world, I’m going to lose my goddamn mind any second.
“Jules? What the hell? Do you know what time it is?” Lexi asks with the gun still pointed at Preston.
“Do you know you’re in my freaking house? For God's sake, put the gun down before you shoot Preston.”
“Julia, I love you, girl, but who the fuck is this, and why does she have a gun?” Preston asks.
Lexi finally lowers the gun and turns on the porch light.
