Page 54 of Finally Forever
I unclench my tight jaw. “You’re right.” As much as I don’t want to admit it, he is.
He grins, his posture less defensive. “Let’s go back in there and ask her to join us for dinner. She set two spots on the table, and I doubt it was for you and her.”
“Yeah.” I nod.
A scene—memory?—of Nathan yelling at me in my attic bedroom where I lived at his house during college flashes in my mind. He was the only friend I had who wasn’t afraid to put me in my place. I respected him for that, even if I can’t remember the details of the argument we had in my room. Blonde wavy hair peeking out from under the covers in my bed flashes through my mind, too. Ainsley? Was she there for that argument? Is this a fragment of a memory or my scrambled brain’s way of trying to connect the past to the future?
We return to the kitchen.
Ainsley has the food on our plates, our wine and water glasses filled, too.
“Bon appétit.” She stands near the kitchen island, an empty plate next to the steamy casserole that sits on the counter.
I watch her load a small helping onto her dish.
Nathan sits and nods toward her, his signal for me to speak up.
Still standing, I clear my throat. “Are you eating with us?”
She picks up her plate and a glass of rosé. “I…didn’t know if I was welcome.”
“You’re welcome,” Nathan blurts with conviction. “Come join us.”
She glances at me, waiting for my approval. I pull out the chair next to mine. “Please. Join us.” There, that was nice. I even said please.
“Okay.” A shy smile forms on her pretty face.
She sits beside me, and I grin with approval.
After a few moments of silent eating, she says to Nathan, “How did you meet your fiancée?”
“We’ve known each other our whole lives. Childhood friends. Our dads served in the military together and remained close friends after, even opened a business together. She was off limits, but I’ve never been good at resisting what I want.”
“Me, neither.” Ainsley’s gaze flickers to me.
I guzzle my wine. Since when do I need to drink to ease my nerves? Since her. I imagine it was like this for me when we first met. She has a sweet sexiness about her that is appealing. She’s all wrong for me, but maybe that’s why it worked.
She bites pasta, her full lips enveloping the spoon, reminding me of how amazing her mouth felt on my dick. I might need a repeat of that with her tonight. She was eager to please me before and loved everything I did to her. Would she be as willing again? Luring her to my bed is a bad idea.
Did I lure her like this when we first met, or did she come on to me? My guess is I did the pursuing, because I can’t imagine her making a move. She’s loyal to me. That much is obvious. For that alone, Nathan was right in saying I owe her.
I can’t promise her any hope for a future now, or maybe ever. My plan is my priority, but if I sleep with her, I need to offer her something in return. The promise to find her after I follow through with my plan—if I survive—and try to remember our past. Could I offer her that?
22
Ainsley
I stick my toe out of the warm bath water. Lavender oil swirls in the steamy air as I inhale several soothing breaths. A tendril of my hair falls from my messy bun. I tuck it behind my ear and sink deeper in the tub. Tonight was weird. Who am I kidding? Every night since Sebastian lost his memories has been weird. Tonight, though, something seemed different.
I’m sure Nathan is behind the new kindness Sebastian showed me. Nathan adds light and humor to everything. Kensington is a lucky lady. I’m happy for him. He’s not that different from his college days. More mellow and mature from how he explained his new life with Kensington—or Kensie, as he referred to her several times at dinner.
He made Sebastian laugh a few times, and I wanted to hug him for the brilliant, beautiful smile on Sebastian’s face. I love that smile. I’ve missed it.
He seems as foreign and forbidden as he was when we first met. I had no intention of pursuing him back then. Harper wanted to date him, and I was nothing compared to her. But Sebastian chose me. We formed a friendship once I started working for him and enjoyed the best flirty banter over the phone, but it was the night of the toga party that changed everything between us.
Nathan always threw parties, but this one was memorable. The regular bulbs had been replaced with black lights throughout the sprawling estate his parents owned in Winter Park. They let Nathan live there during college while they remained in their home state of Texas. He invited Riley and Sebastian to live with him. I wouldn’t call it a frat house—way too luxurious, for one thing, and the parties were private. Invitation only, with football players as bouncers at the door. I didn’t know Sebastian was in the mafia, either. I’d heard rumors. He was the talk of the private elite college. Harper believed the rumors from the beginning.
I didn’t know it was true until I’d begun working for him, answering phones at the auto body shop he owned. I’d fallen for him by then, even though I didn’t know it. We were a secret. Forbidden. Being with him was dangerous. He was betrothed to the psychotic Marina and a few months away from a mafia initiation ceremony. The ceremony required him to kill a man, point-blank between the eyes, in front of his father to pledge his unyielding loyalty.
