Page 59 of Waiting Forever
My breathing grows heavy as desire swarms me in an agonizing way.
Why had I told him to go slow?
His fingers find the low zipper on the back of the dress. He pauses and kisses my chest where my breast swells above the neckline.
“Take it off, Nathan,” I whisper-order through my panting breath. A girl can only take so much.
He eases down the zipper at a torturous pace.
“Oh my God, Nathan. Strip me already.”
He chuckles and kisses a path to my mouth, planting a kiss on my lips. “I thought you wanted slow so you could remember everything.”
“I did but now I just want you. Please, Nathan. Haven’t I waited long enough?”
He grins and kisses me once, twice, three times. “You are so damn sexy when you beg.”
In an instant, he hooks my knees from behind and somehow tosses me onto my back.
I bounce on the mattress and giggle. “What was that?”
“Me speeding things up.” He tugs his shirt over his head.
My gaze devours his broad chest, firm muscles, slim torso, and the way his abs ripple when he moves. He unzips the fly to his jeans, his erection evident from the large bulge. I hadn’t considered that. Given his size in general, I should have assumed that part of him would be huge, too.
Again, nerves swarm me and my insides tighten. What if he doesn’t fit? I’ve had sex with only two guys, and they were built like teenagers. Nathan is a strong, well-built man.
“What’s wrong? You’re tensing.” He eyes my knees, which are locked together.
My thigh muscles are clenched, along with every other muscle in my body. This isn’t how I imagined our first time playing out.
Nathan stops messing with his jeans. “Are you scared? I would never hurt you.”
I let out a soft laugh. “I’m not scared at all. I’m worried about your size. You’re a big guy and I’m—”
“Tiny in comparison,” he finishes my thought. “Don’t worry. I thought about that, too, and I have a plan.”
“A plan?”
“Do you trust me?”
I nod. “With everything. Even my life.”
Tenderness shows in his eyes. He rubs his hand over his heart. It’s as sweet as it is sexy, because, wow, this guy is built. So strong, and yet he can be so gentle.
“My supplies are upstairs. Maybe we should continue this in my room.”
“Supplies?” I tense and the desire in me runs cold. I glance at the ceiling, remembering the banging of his headboard only weeks ago while he did the nasty with Harper. That oughta kill the mood for good. I sit up and tuck my feet by my hips.
“I know that look. Shit.” Nathan runs a hand through his already messy hair. “Was it the ‘supplies’ comment?”
How do I explain this? I secure my straps on my arms to keep my dress from falling down. “I want you, Nathan, more than you might ever know, but something about this doesn’t feel right. I mean, you were just with your girlfriend in your room using your supplies not that long ago. I don’t want to come across as needing special treatment from you, but—I don’t know—I guess I do because I could never have sex with you in that bed.” I glance toward the ceiling. “It’s your room. I know that and it isn’t fair, but I also know there have been many other girls in that bed, using whatever supplies you might have.” I sigh and focus on the blue and white floral comforter, too ashamed to meet his gaze. “I’m sorry. I should have never started this. Your past is just too real now, and I can’t be one of those girls. I just can’t.”
He’s so silent and still, I have to peek up to make sure he hasn’t left the room. The hurt on his face slices through me. I want to erase the pain I’ve caused, but I don’t know how.
“I can understand why you’d feel that way, but I can’t change the past, Kensington. I fucked up with Harper. I never should have…” He shakes his head and closes his eyes for a moment. “I don’t want to fuck this up with you. I’ll do whatever you want. I’ll throw out my bed if you want. I’ll get a new mattress. It’s time I get a new one anyway. Actually, I wanted to run something by you, but I wasn’t sure if I should. Now, I think it might be the perfect solution.”
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