Page 91 of Unlocked Dive
Wednesday
“Go home, Byrd. Get your shit together. Self-pity never looked good on you.”
“I still have nine seasons ofSupernaturalto finish.”
James glances at the TV and shakes his head.
“I’ll save you the trouble. The show peaked in season five, and Dean and Cas never fuck. Also, you have Netflix in Mendo.”
“Your TV is bigger.”
And a ghost haunts my once-sanctuary.
I’m not ready to face it. When the future I pushed him toward subsumes the past that drowns me—when I can close my eyes and see him walking the halls of Cici instead of sprawled wanton in my bed—then maybe I can move on with my own.
“Fine. But you gotta take a shower, man. The whole apartment is starting to smell like a midlife crisis, and we’re both too young for that shit.”
Friday
The heat baking off the 101 flickers over my skin, burning away the memory of blue rain, blue eyes, blue hair. I leave the window down and crank the AC andfuck the carbon footprintbecause I find half a pack of Spirit golds in the cupholder and smoke them all the way past the drought-bleached hills and checkerboard vineyards of Sonoma county, until my stomach curdles and my fingers stain.
When Reggie’s name lights up my phone, I pull off onto a gravel road bracketed by the scorched-earth scabs of last year’s wildfires and climb out into the sun to answer.
“About fucking time. I was starting to get worried about you.”
“I’m alive.” Sort of.
“Barely, by the sound of it. Keeping up with the twenty-one-year-old taking more out of you than you expected, old man?”
Something like that.I drop my head back onto the roof of the 4-Runner and close my eyes, letting the hot metal sear into the back of my neck.
“Never mind, don’t answer that,” she barrels on with a laugh. “I talked to Claire, and she said he killed the eval, so that means he’s officially my student again. I don’t want to think about the two of you holed up in some swanky hotel room celebrating all week.”
“That’s not—”
“Seriously, though. Claire said he was amazing. I’m almost sorry I gave you so much shit. You pulled it off in spite of everything.”
“It was all Echo.”It was always Echo.
“So how did you celebrate?”
“You’re so fucking tight. I’m gonna come so hard inside you, baby.”
“I took him to see Aluré.” Regret is bitter on my tongue. “I punched Gabriel.”
“Youwhat? Not that that doesn’t sound like a celebration, but how?”
“He was at the show. He hurt Echo, and he told him everything, and…” It’s too fucking complicated, and I’m too fucking exhausted to explain. “So I sent Echo back to LA.” It sounds better that way. Like a choice instead of a tragedy. It’s almost true.
She’s quiet for so long that I open my eyes to make sure my phone didn’t drop the call.
“Reg?”
“Why?”
“Because I’m a fucking coward. I don’t deserve him anyway. He’s all yours now.”
“For fuck’s sake. Will you just come home already?”
