Page 90 of Unlocked Dive
“Don’t you have somewhere better to be?” I ask. “I don’t need a babysitter. There’s a motel around the corner.”
“Fuck off.” He grins. “I’m taking you home to sleep it off. If you keep acting so pathetic, I might even let you snuggle me.”
“You’re not my type.”
“Let me guess. Your type is young, blue-haired, and tattooed, with a smart mouth and a bubble butt.”
Bubble butt?
He throws his head back with a genuine laugh.
“I work tech in the Bay Area, remember? I pick up a few things.”
“I don’t care. Never say those words in my presence again.”
“Hey, I’m only trying to bond with you.” The place is starting to fill up with the evening crowd, so he walks back to the bar to retrieve our shots. “Now,” he says, after I knock mine back and he takes a respectable swallow. “Tell me why you’re drowning your broken heart with Clancey instead of chasing that boy ofyours down and getting him back.” For once, I don’t argue with the “boy” comment. It hits a little too close to home.
“He’s leaving for college in a month. His whole life is about to start, and he doesn’t need me holding him back.”
“Why would you try to hold him back?”
“I wouldn’ttryto, asshole. I just would. Did you hear the part about how he’s leaving? No way I’d ask him to give up the prime years of his career to hole up with me in Mendocino.”
“So why couldn’t you go with him? The school’s in Tilburg, right? Your hometown?”
Is he fucking kidding me? I snag the glass in front of him and drain the last inch of his whiskey before he can protest.
“Because. He didn’t ask me to.”
“Jesus fucking Christ, Byrd. Of course he didn’t ask you to.”
“Exactly.” Maybe if I’d stuck to the beer, he’d be making sense?
“Get your head out of your ass, old man. This kid,Echo—I’m assuming he knows about your history with Lara? You didn’t hidethatfrom him, or you never would’ve let him meet me and Elke.”
“He knows everything.”Now. “What does it matter?”
The mirth fades, replaced with compassion.
“It matters, you idiot, because that’s exactly what my sister did to you. She asked you to give up your life for her. And Echo knows it destroyed your marriage. If he loves you as much as you obviously love him, he’d never do that to you again. It doesn’t mean he wouldn’t say yes if you offered.”
“I can’t keep chasing the people I love across the world, James. Echo is the one who drove that home for me.”
“It’s not the chasing that’s the issue. It’s what you leave behind.” He slaps me on the shoulder and stands up from his chair. “Try to figure that one out while I go get my car.”
38
Byrd
Monday
My ass is still sore.
I let James think I’m walking gingerly because I spent the night hugging the porcelain throne and that it’s the hangover and not the heartbreak keeping me buried in his guest bed all day. I’m not sure he’s fooled.
He leaves me with some high-end Whole Foods electrolyte bullshit and a bottle of Advil and heads to work with an unsympathetic chuckle. I ignore the offerings and retreat into the oblivion of sleep.
I wake up midafternoon, cotton-mouthed and sticky with sweat and half-remembered dreams—Echo at my back like a righteous god, driving me to the brink of madness with his tongue and fingers and elegant, ruthless cock. The pain has faded to a vaporous ache, and I slip a hand between my legs to coax it back to urgent life. If I let my body forget him, I’ll have nothing left.
