Page 70 of Rebel Heart
“Is that… Would that be alright with you?”
Tears clouded my vision as I nodded slowly. “Yes,” I rasped.
Beau sent me a look that indicated he didn’t believe me at all. “So, why are you crying?”
I waved one hand in the air dismissively as the other wiped at the tears that had spilled down mycheeks. “Hormones. I’m using the hormones as my excuse.”
His soft laughter filled the air as he took my hand in his, scooted closer, and wrapped his arms around me. “If I’m honest, this was the most unexpected turn of events, but if it’s always like this with you, Jules, if it’s like it was between us in the beginning, I think it’s going to be the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
I tipped my head back to look at him. “You’re going to make me cry.”
“I thought it was the hormones.” His hand cupped my cheek as his eyes roamed over my face. “I told you I want to do this right. So, tears or not, I need to tell you this. I want to do whatever’s necessary to be involved in what’s happening with this baby. But I also want to focus on us, on spending time with you and learning more about you.”
My teeth bit down on my lip to prevent me from breaking into full-fledged sobs. But all that he’d said was so perfect, I couldn’t hold it back. I barely managed to grin at him before the sobbing took hold of me.
Beau, proving himself to be a man of his word, did right by me and saw me through it.
I’d heardof pregnancy stealing a woman’s confidence. Ijust hadn’t expected it to hit me so soon and in this manner.
It had been three days since Beau came home from his demo tour, and I shared the news of my pregnancy with him.
Beau hadn’t let a day go by without seeing me since. Whether I worked late or was home a little bit earlier, he made the effort to see me. And he always came to me.
For that reason alone, I should’ve been confident, empowered.
But three days in, and it was the opposite for me.
Sensing my stare on him, Beau looked at me and tipped his head curiously. “What’s going on?”
“You haven’t changed your mind.”
A crease formed between his furrowed brows. “About what?”
I’d been laying on my side on the couch in my apartment, Beau sitting at the opposite end of the couch. “We’re not doing anything.”
“Jules, I’m a little lost. What are you talking about?”
“A few days ago, you said all the right things about what you wanted to do, and it included us spending time together, getting to know one another better.”
“Right. What’s the problem?”
“We’re just here, staring at the television,” I noted.
His features softened, warmth leaking into his expression. “You’re tired. The last few days, you’ve come home from work feeling so exhausted. I’m not going to drag you out to do something when you’re barely able to keep your eyelids open.”
I closed my eyes, savoring the relief I felt when I did. He wasn’t wrong. I felt like it had taken every last ounce of strength I had to get through my days. And I loved what I did, so I could only imagine how it must have been for women who worked jobs they hated.
“I know. That’s why I’m surprised you haven’t changed your mind.”
“What would I be changing my mind about?”
I opened my eyes again. “This can’t be fun for you. Sitting around and not doing anything. We were supposed to be spending time together.”
Beau rested his hand on my leg, just above my ankle. If I wasn’t so tired, I might have allowed the touch of his fingertips on my skin to penetrate. “We are spending time together. And correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think you’re having much fun feeling so tired all the time.”
“I’m not.”
“So, why on earth do you think I’d be so selfish to push you to do something else when you’re already having a tough time? This isn’t going to last forever, Jules. In a few weeks, you’ll start feeling more like yourself. I’ll plan a lot of things for us to do then.”
