Page 65 of Rebel Heart
“Superpower?”
She’d said one word, but the sound of her voice was like music to my ears.
“I wasn’t expecting you here, but I’m glad you are, because you and I have something to talk about.”
In a flash, Jules sat up and brought her horrified gaze to meet mine. “What?”
My lips twitched. God, she was beautiful.
I climbed onto the trampoline and sat down. “You and I need to talk.”
Jules’ entire body had gone rigid. The only movement was the rapid rise and fall of her chest, like she was terrified I was about to deliver the worst news of her life. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing at all.” I moved close and reached for her hand. Part of it was the need I felt to touch her, but the bigger part of it was to offer her some reassurance. “I promise this isn’t bad.”
All that I’d said and done to ease her concerns didn’t appear to be helping. Jules was just as doubtful, caution and worry lingering in those beautiful blue eyes.
I offered a smile and a gentle squeeze on her hand. “I don’t think I’m doing a very good job of reassuring you, so I’m just going to come right out with it, if that’s okay.”
“Please,” she begged, her voice a touch above a whisper and filled with desperation.
I had to look away for a moment, because for a moment, my confidence wavered. What if she didn’t want this anymore? What if I’d ruined my only chance to have her?
Returning my attention to her face, noting the questions there, I said, “I missed you these two weeks, Jules. I’m so glad you’re here.”
“That’s what you wanted to tell me?”
I laughed and shook my head. “No. No, that’s not it.” My thumb stroked along her knuckles. “I… Well, I’m not really sure how to say this, but I’ve taken a lot of time to think over the last two weeks while I’ve been away.”
Evidently, that was the wrong thing to say, because Jules grew even more anxious. Her shoulders lifted toward her ears, her expression even more uneasy. “And?”
“I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you,” I revealed. “Actually, I think it’d be more accurate to say I haven’t stopped thinking about us.”
Her lips parted in surprise. “What do you mean?”
My eyes roamed over every perfect feature of her face. Those eyes and that beautiful mouth. Her adorable nose and flawless skin. Every part of her was perfect.
Talon had made a great point. Every word he said was true. Because after being away for two whole weeks without her, coming home to find Jules here just felt right. Like she was who I’d needed here all along.
“I know I said some things to you a few weeks ago that indicated I felt differently, but somewhere alongthe line, things changed for me. I can’t ignore the way I feel, Jules. And I want you.”
Her eyes rounded. I waited, believing and hoping she was going to break out in a full-fledged grin or perhaps start jumping up and down on the trampoline. If anything, she seemed even more troubled. “I… I… You… What?”
“I want you, Jules. I want to be with you.” I swore I could feel her trembling beside me, but I had to get it all out. Now that I’d started, I didn’t want to risk stopping and forgetting to say anything. “I’ve never done this before. I’ve neverwantedto do this before. But there’s something about you that I just can’t let go of, something I don’t want to walk away from. And if you decide to give me—to give us—this chance, I’ll warn you now that I’m probably going to make a shit ton of mistakes. And I’m going to ask you for grace and understanding and compassion, because I might screw up, but I promise I want to do things right. You may need to help me through this the same way you helped me make those cookies. I don’t know how to be in a relationship, Jules, but I want to try to figure it out with you.”
Tears filled her eyes, and I sensed her trembling even harder beside me.
This wasn’t exactly the reaction I’d expected, but perhaps this was part of it, part of learning about the woman I hadn’t been able to get off my mind for weeks now. I’d seen how she reacted when she was hurt—she’d been strong enough to put me in my place and kick me out of her apartment—so I knew that this wasn’t sadness.
Perhaps she was just in shock that I’d finally come around after telling her I couldn’t give her what she wanted.
Or was it worse than that? She’d gone out before. Was it possible she’d met someone? Is that why she was waiting here when I returned? If she was here to tell me that she’d started dating someone and couldn’t continue to have any sort of relationship, not even a friendship, with me, I wasn’t sure what I’d do.
“Beau, I… Where did this come from?”
Well, at least she hadn’t said the worst yet. Maybe she was just being cautious and looking for more clarification, because she didn’t want to wind up hurt again.
“Truthfully, I think it’s always been there,” I confessed. “The problem was that I didn’t understand it until I was away from you these last two weeks. I know it probably seems a bit surreal or hasty, but I swear I wouldn’t be saying this to you if it were untrue. I wouldn’t ever toy with your emotions like that again. The entire time I was gone, no matter what city or what I was doing, you were always on my mind. The highlight of every day for me was when I got to talk to you before bed. And then I’d struggle to fall asleep, because I’d replay our conversations or think about how I wanted to come back here to tell you how things changed for me. I’d imagine what things could be like between us, and all of it was phenomenal.”
