Page 103 of Rebel Heart
“So, what happened with your dad?”
A look of disgust washed over him. “I’m not quite sure who was worse between the two of them. I don’t believe that there’s any excuse for my father to do what he did, but I can admit that I used to wonder if it was my mom being so ridiculously strict and unwavering about everything that pushed him away. I honestly don’t know the details, because he refused to share. But when I was fourteen, I learned that my father had a whole separate family on the side. Two kids and a girlfriend, since he was still legally married to my mom. He’d tried to get me to meet my half-siblings, but I refused. They aren’t much younger than me, and all I could think as a teenager was that instead of doing things to help support me in my life, my dad was doing that for these other kids. I hated them from the beginning, even if I can look back at it now and understand that none of it was their fault. I don’t feel anyconnection to my parents, not the way I think a kid should, so I certainly don’t feel any loss by not meeting his other children.”
I couldn’t even begin to imagine how he must have felt as a teenager. While he was going through what had to be one of the most impressionable times of his life, his parents were making him feel anything but loved. It all made sense now why he’d said he didn’t believe in love. I couldn’t blame him, not when the two people who should have cared the most for him didn’t.
“I’m so sorry for what you endured at such a young age,” I told him.
He’d been resting his weight back on his palms behind him. But he sat up, wrapped his arms around me, and kissed my neck. “Thanks, Jules, but I’m okay now. Everything worked out for me far better than I could’ve ever imagined. I’m not the least bit upset about my life.”
“That’s good. I’m glad. Oh?—”
My hand flew to my stomach as Beau worried, “What? What’s wrong?”
I reached for his hand, placed it on my belly, and said, “The baby is kicking. I think you could feel it now.”
Beau’s eyes widened in disbelief as he kept his whole body still and waited. Seconds passed, and I started to think it wouldn’t happen again, but then, one strong kick right to his hand.
His jaw fell open. “Oh my God. I felt it.”
The baby kicked again.
“He did it again.”
“He?”
Beau shrugged. “It’s just my feeling. I’d be okay if it was a girl, too.” He looked down at his hand and stared in such disbelief.
I leaned back on my palms like he’d just been as Beau shifted his whole body to bring his face close to where his hand was. “Can you hear us? We’re your parents.”
As though having a conversation with his or her father, our baby kicked Beau’s hand a third time. Tears filled his eyes as he stroked his fingers lightly across my belly. “This is the most amazing thing I’ve ever experienced.”
I smiled, resting my hand on the top of his head. For so long, I’d been experiencing all the changes with this pregnancy. Beau had gotten the pregnancy test, an exhausted wife, her unwelcoming family, and hearing the baby’s heartbeat. Getting to witness him experiencing our baby kicking was magical.
Beau kissed my belly. “I love you, little one. I love you so much.”
Now it was my turn to get emotional.
Beau lifted his gaze to meet mine. “I love you, too, Jules. I’ve been feeling something fierce for you for a long time now, but I didn’t know what it was. I understand it now. And I want you to know that I love you.”
A tear slid down my cheek. “I love you, too. I feel like I’ve been falling for a while now. Despite all the doubts you’ve had about believing in love, I can assure you that you’re so good at it. At all of this.”
Keeping one hand on my belly, Beau sat up in front of me. Then he drove his other hand into my hair andsaid, “You are the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”
He didn’t give me an opportunity to respond before he urged me in his direction and captured my mouth in a claiming kiss.
BEAU - THREE WEEKS LATER
“Something’s wrong.”
I thought we’d gotten through the worst of it.
Things had improved tremendously for Jules in her relationships with individual members of her family. Of course, it wasn’t where she wanted it to be, and she frequently mentioned that she wanted things to be better between her family and me.
I didn’t have the heart to tell her what I’d done weeks ago. How I’d convinced them to do what they were doing now. That they were only being cordial to me for her sake, not because I was suddenly growing on them. Not because they cared to have any kind of reasonable relationship with me.
It only bothered me to the extent that it upset Jules. If they never wanted to let go of their distaste for me, it wouldn’t impact me either way. I’d lived plenty of my life not being liked by my own blood relatives. A fewmore that I’d married into wouldn’t make me feel worse.
I had Jules. She loved me. And that was more than enough for me.
