Page 102 of The Dazzling Heights
“Atlas. I need to talk to you.” She saw her dad flinch a little at the request, but it didn’t matter. None of it mattered, as long as she and Atlas had each other.
His eyes swept toward her for a moment, then away. “We’re kind of busy right now.”
The dismissal hurt, but she let it go. “Please.”
Atlas wavered for a moment, then gave some excuse to the group and followed her a distance away. “What’s going on?” he hissed, but she didn’t answer, just led him determinedly downward, to lower and still lower terraces, until they were at a gateway markedNO ACCESS. She pushed it open and dragged Atlas onto the small, grim, dingy balcony behind it, crowded with machinery and jutting directly over the canal. The rush of water beneath them was loud in her ears.
“Think we’re far enough yet?” Atlas demanded sarcastically.
She hated how hostile he sounded—not like Atlas at all, but some stranger inhabiting his body. Ignoring the question, Avery grabbed the collar of his shirt and pulled him roughly down to kiss him.
He was still her Atlas, she saw with relief: same mouth, same hands, same shoulders as ever. She slid her hands over those shoulders to twine up in his hair, at the back of his neck where it curled, just a little.I love you so much, and I’m sorry.
Atlas pulled away, shaking his head. “This isn’t fair,” he said, his voice only a little shaky. “You can’t be furious with me for weeks and then just decide to kiss me here, at the most crowded party of our lives.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered.
“What’s going on with you, Avery? What happened to prompt … this?” Atlas made an impatient gesture, taking in her mutilated dress, her tangled hair. The kiss.
She told herself not to panic that he’d called her Avery and not Aves. “There’s something you need to know about Calliope. She’s not what she seems.” That sounded a bit theatrical, so she tried again. “She’s a fraud, Atlas—she’s been lying to you this whole time, playing you. She doesn’t evenlikeyou.”
“What are you talking about?”
“She and her mom are …” She fumbled for the right word.Con artistssounded like something out of a bad holo. “Operators. They use people for their money, then move on to a new place, with a new identity.”
Carefully, haltingly, Avery explained the whole thing. She told Atlas about Calliope’s various aliases, her mom’s arrest record; she sent him the pics that Leda had found, of all their many identities. Through it all he just nodded silently, scarcely blinking.
“Shit,” Atlas muttered when she finally fell silent. He shook his head in disbelief, his brown eyes glazed over.
“I know. I’m so sorry.” She wasn’t really, though. She wanted Calliope gone, and Atlas back, and the world restored to its rightful order.
“How did you learn all this?”
Avery reached for his hand, lacing his fingers in hers. “I just did. I can’t explain, but I promise it’s all true.”
A murmured cry rose up from the crowds above them as another round of fireworks began to launch. Avery didn’t glance away from Atlas’s face. He was very quiet, thinking everything over. He seemed lost in a world of his own making.
“Don’t worry,” she said softly, a little concerned by his silence. “I already told her to leave. And if she doesn’t, we’llmakeher. We can do anything, together.”
Atlas withdrew his hand from hers in a sudden, jerky motion. “Wearen’t going to do anything. I’ll handle this on my own.”
“Atlas—”
“Please don’t. This is hard enough already.” He was looking determinedly at the water, which unnerved her, because it meant he couldn’t even bear to look her in the eyes. Fireworks erupted in great black-and-white bursts overhead, casting otherworldly shadows that danced across his face.
“I’m a little stunned, to be honest. And pissed off. Not that anything has happened between me and Calliope,” Atlas added, which made Avery’s heart leap eagerly. “But I’m still exhausted,” he went on, his words heavy. “I need to get away from this—from all of it.”
“Exactly. We can get away together, you and me, like we planned!” Avery exclaimed. Now that Leda was back on her side, and wanted to help her, there was nothing keeping them apart anymore.
But Atlas shook his head. “We were right to end things when we did. We tried, but no matter how hard we try, we haven’t been able to make it work.” He gave Avery a look that terrified her. “Do you know what Dad named the hotel in the dark Tower?”
“Fanaa.” A sudden panic was creeping over her skin.
“It means destroying yourself for the one you love.” Atlas spoke urgently. “That’sus, Avery. Don’t you see? We’re literally destroying each other. It’s too complicated, and there are too many people who can be hurt. Especially you and me.”
“So you don’t love me anymore.” That was the only explanation that made sense. How could he love her and not want to be with her?
“Of course I love you,” Atlas insisted. “I’ll always love you. But love isn’t necessarily enough. You can’t build a life on it.”
