Page 64 of The Fangirl Project
His eyes snap to mine in the same second I notice him, and it almost stops me in my tracks. He drops his arms slightly, stands a little straighter.
He looksgood.
And not just “boy in soccer uniform” good, but…
I sigh internally, becausesexyis not a word I wouldeverwant to associate with Max, and yet. AndYET.
He’s wearing dark-wash jeans and a black sweatshirt that manages to strike the perfect balance between casual and flattering, the long sleeves pushed up near his elbows. His hair is in that stupid some-up-some-down bun again, except right now I really have to (and hate to) admit to myself that it looks very much theoppositeof stupid; his hair looks shiny and wavy in a way I almost envy.
Someone leaves the room, and Anissa bumps into me as she moves to let them past, reminding me exactly what motivated me to invite her here in the first place. Jake, playing up to his audience, still hasn’t noticed us.
“Come on,” I say to Anissa, and we pick our way across the room. When we get close to Max, she steps to my side instead of huddling behind me, and I say, “Anissa, this is the guy I was telling you about—”
But I don’t get much further, because then Jake suddenly cries, “Cerys! You’re here!” and leaps out of the sofa with surprising agility considering he was rather hemmed in by all the people piled on with him, and I’m engulfed in a hug while Anissa and Max are left to make their own introductions. I’m relieved to hear them both speaking quietly behind me.
Jake wiggles me side to side, and I laugh, realizing he’s already tipsy. I can smell the cider on his breath, matching the almost-empty bottle in his hand. When he finally releases me, I notice he’sin his usual partywear of a blue shirt I once told him brings out his eyes, and his favorite brown chinos.
He looks good, too.
Just not quite as—
Nope. NOPE. We are not even entertaining that thought, Cerys, shut up.
Jake takes in my dress, and says, “That’s new. Does it fit? It looks a little big here.” He gestures to his own chest, and even though it stings, even thoughof coursehe would notice, I was stupid to think he wouldn’t, I remember The Fangirl Project and swipe lightly, playfully at his arm.
“Is this another display of the famous Wandsworth charm, Jake? You staring at my boobs within three seconds of seeing me?”
He laughs, holding his hands up, and pulling an “oops” sort of face. I suppose a bit like that misguided attempt with Daphne’s lip gloss, at least heisnoticing me, and that’s a step in the right direction.
“You look very nice, Cerys,” he says sincerely, and the smile he gives me—the way he looks me right in the eyes, all soft and lovely and familiar—makes me feel warm and fuzzy in a way no amount of gin-spiked lemonade ever could.
“Thank you.” I let my eyes flick slowly up and down his outfit, too, and I let him notice. “You don’t look so bad yourself, Jake.”
“Scrub up all right, don’t I?” He winks, then slings his arm around me as he turns me to face Max and Anissa. “All right, Anissa? Good to see you!”
“Y-yeah, um, you too.”
“Wish we’d known sooner you were so intoOf Wrath and Rune.You could’ve come to Comic Con with us! Next time, though, yeah? It’ll be sick.”
“I’d love that! I was telling Cerys earlier, I’ve never really had anybody to share the fandom stuff with, and Comic Con seemed way too intense to go to on my own. I didn’t even realize they did them outside of London.”
Excitable, animated, the words spill out of her, and she misses the stunned double take Jake does that says,Really? Anissa, a chatterbox?
The look I give him in response says,Tell me about it!And I bump my hip to his to make sure he’s paying attention to her.
“I looked into going to a Dungeons and Dragons night at one of the board game cafés in town before,” she’s saying now. “There’s a couple of podcasts I listen to about it, likeThe Adventure ZoneandCritical Roleand stuff, and it seemssocool. I even made a whole character sheet! It said it was for new players, but I sort of chickenedout…”
“Shutup. No, dude,yes,right.” Jake is so swept up that he can hardly form a sentence, and I laugh—until he drops his arm from around me to grab Anissa. “I would totally go to that with you! I play with my brother and some of his friends, and it’s mostly over video chat and stuff now, but we haven’t done that inages.I play a bard, obviously, I’m a nat-twenty charisma through and through, like I was ever going to play anything else…”
And just like that, they’re gone, falling onto a vacant chair, Anissa with her feet propped up on the seat and Jake with his legs straddling the arm, hands waving wildly as he speaks and Anissa’sown enthused gestures no less passionate, both talking a mile a minute.
I blink. What just happened?
Have I…
Have I just been usurpedagain,and given Jake his ideal fandom-loving girlfriend in Anissa, instead of showing him thatI’mthatgirl?
This isn’t…that wasn’t…
