Page 94 of The Fangirl Project
“Cerys!” Anissa yells. “The train!”
I shout a last goodbye to Dad and hustle over the bridge with her to the other platform. As we collapse into some seats, my heart is thundering, but I think that has more to do with the adrenaline rush of what today is about than the dash for the train.
I’ll get to meet everyone, this odd collection of friends I’ve come to know and cherish over the past six months and never would’ve met withoutOWAR;and, more important, it’s the first time I’ll be seeing Jake since the fireworks party.
And Max. But I’m not thinking about Max.I amnot—thinking—about—Max!
My stomach in knots, I unlock my phone to look again at the last few texts with Jake to try to reassure myself.
Me
Hey, I just wanted to say I can’t wait to see you tomorrow at the meet-up, Anissa mentioned you were definitely going. I’ve missed hanging out with you x
Jake
Me too. I’m sorry Cer, my head’s just been all over the place. Everything after the party was just…I dunno, it’s a lot to explain?
Me
I really never meant to hurt you
Jake
I know. Me either. I’m sorry. See you tomorrow? X
—
The texts might be short,but they feel honest andweightyin a way his other texts lately haven’t, and ever since, I’ve been toying with an idea I can’t quite shake. A grand gesture, per TheNew and ImprovedFangirl Project.
Something I know I’ll regret if I don’t do.
Because, really, there’s only so long we can do the constant messaging and flirty banter over Discord while pretending like we’re keeping each other at arm’s length, isn’t there? I know it feels safer and less scary when we useOWARas a front, but that doesn’t make it any lessreal.
I thought I didn’t want to ruin the friendship we’d salvaged, but—it’s so muchmorethan that, isn’t it? My longtime crush. The endless late-night conversations. His reaction to the kiss with Max. That’s not justfriendship,is it?
“Are you okay?” Anissa asks me. Her leg hasn’t stopped jiggling, but she’s nervous for different reasons.
I turn my phone screen off, and take a deep breath before smiling. “I’m perfect.Todayis going to be perfect. I think…Anissa, I think I’m going to tell him how I feel.”
She beams at me, showing the gap in her teeth, and gives an excited wriggle in her seat. “About time!”
I laugh. “Is it that obvious?”
“Youbothare. Never mind Moonsilver, I’m shipping Mythicrascal these days.”
“You really think he’ll take it well? That he…he feels the same way?”
The level gaze she gives me reminds me that she might even know Jake better than I do currently.
I swallow a shriek, trying to contain myself.
I’m on my way to meet up with my fandom friends, with Anissa, and I’m finally going to tell the boy I like that I love him.
It really is all coming together.
31
When Anissa and I enterthe back room of the board game café just before 2p.m., the place is already packed. It’s not a very large space, but it’s full with about fifteen people—faces and voices I don’t instantly recognize, even if I’ve known these people for months.
