Page 47 of The Holiday Hate-Off
If I were smart, I’d go straight home after Hidden Italy closes tomorrow night. I know from some roundabout questions I asked my brothers that the club meets at seven.
But Lucy will be waiting for something to happen, expecting it…
I’d be an asshole to let her down, wouldn’t I?
The next night,I go back to Kippis with Giovanni and Nico at around six forty-five so I can watch everyone arrive for Crochet Club. Nonna Francesca is closing up Hidden Italy with one of the high school kids who works for us part time.
“What exactly are we looking for?” Giovanni asks, tilting his head toward me. “Are you afraid this woman’s going to attack you with knitting needles?”
“You only use a single hook for crocheting,” says Nico, as if he’s suddenly a crocheting expert.
“How do you know this?” I ask. Our mother used to knit, but I never paid much attention, to be honest. And after she left, I threw most of her knitting stuff away one night. No one ever called me on it.
“I go sometimes,” Nico says with a shrug. “Or I did before you got banned from the Sip and Nonna Francesca said the rest of us had to stay away out of solidarity.” He taps his temples. “It’s good for the mind.”
“There’s no age limit for this club?” I ask.
“Nah,” he says. “You’d be surprised by the people who show. Like that bookstore guy.”
Well, I really don’t like the fucking sound of that. The owner of the local bookstore, Fredrik, is my age, or close enough, and I overheard Aria calling him a fox once. He’s awidower, too, and an occasional subject of speculation in the Lovewatch column.
“Seriously?” I mutter. “Don’t tell me he crochets too.”
My brothers exchange a look.
“Oh, sure,” Nico says. “He goes all the time. He’s a crocheting machine.”
“But let’s be honest.” Giovanni lifts his beer, giving me a wicked glance. “He’s probably there tonight because he wants to get lucky with Lucy. Everyone’s saying Eileen’s determined to set her up with someone, and that guy has the looksanda bookstore. You know how much women like bookstores.”
I’m steamed up but trying not to look it. Lucy made a point of telling me not to interrupt her tonight; was it because she’s interested in Fredrik?
Trying to look like I couldn’t give a shit about what’s going on across the street, I say, “Good luck to him. Maybe she’ll draw a mustache on him instead.”
“I heard she got someone to blow up that full-body picture of you and drew a bull’s-eye right at your crotch,” Giovanni says, his eyes dancing with glee. “You think it’s true? Maybe Fredrik will hit the bull’s-eye tonight. You think Lucy will give him a prize if he does?”
I wave my beer at him. “I’m going to go to the Wishing Bridge to wish some woman gets it into her head to driveyoucrazy.”
“Portia’s already doing that,” Nico says, happy to pile on and give our brother some well-deserved grief. “I heard she got the taffy pulling added to the town calendar.”
Giovanni rolls his eyes. “She’s just hoping Amanda will show.”
“What a coincidence,” Nico says. “I’m also hoping she’ll show.”
“You know Amanda is only interested in ladies,” Giovanni tells him.
“So she and I have something in common.”
A few more minutes pass, during which a couple of other old ladies arrive across the street, as well as some surprisingly young ones. The only man who enters is Ralph, who’s close to me in age but no threat to anyone’s virginity. He plays Larry the Lobstah pretty much every holiday season and acts like a dipshit in or out of the costume.
“No sign of Fredrik,” I murmur to myself, and my brothers exchange another look and burst out laughing this time.
“Oh, you assholes,” I say, dismissing them with a wave of my hand. “You were messing with me.”
“And you totally bought it,” Giovanni says smugly. “You’re losing that killer edge, Lorenzo. What would Nonna say?”
Probably nothing complimentary.
“Are you ready to admit you have a thing for this girl?” he presses. Nico nods in agreement.
