Page 15 of The Holiday Hate-Off
“Hi, Skippy,” I say.
The dog lumbers toward me, and then I see it: he has a shred of pink paper adhered to the drool on the side of his face.
Oh, thank God. Enzo doesn’t know my secret. It’s working its way through Skippy’s digestive system.
I give the Saint Bernard a good rubdown. “Do you want to come home with me, buddy?”
His long, furry tail starts wagging, but he licks my outstretched hand and then plops back down and curls up. I’m not worried about him—he has dozens of warm sleeping options and knows it. But it feels a bit like a rejection, after what Enzo said earlier.
You’re an outsider…you’ll always be an outsider.
I shake off the thought, give Skippy a final pet, and turn toward home.
I will not let that asshole hijack my mood or my plan. I will not let that asshole hijack my mood or my plan…
No. In fact, I’m going to spend the rest of the night working my butt off like Buddy the Elf so I can make Santa Speed Dating the most special, most memorable, and most Christmassy event in all of Hideaway Harbor.
Let’s see him best that.
Then I’ll choose a not-so-memorable Santa to resolve my virginity problem for me.
I’m still feeling a righteous high when I reach the door of my apartment and see the little note propped up against it on a thick, creamy notecard. I pick it up and unfold it.
Sorry if this is a strange thing to do, butI noticed you dancing in your window last week. It made me smile, and not a lot of things do that lately. You’re a beautiful dancer. So thank you for the smile.
Gasping, I glance around, but whoever left the note is long gone.
I step inside, shut the door, and head straight for my landline phone and dial Charlie’s number. “The man who watched me dancing in front of my window a few days ago left a note in front of my apartment. Is that scary or romantic? I’ve been spending so much time with Eileen I can’t tell.”
“Holy crap,” she remarks. “She would have a fit. What does it say?”
I tell her, and she mulls it over for a second before saying, “He could live in the building. It’s definitely less weird if he lives in the building.”
“How can I tell?”
“Write him back and ask. Also, I’m coming over.”
“Good, because I feel my competitive streak coming out. I plan on going full Buddy the Elf over this advent calendar reveal. Are you with me? We can plaster the café with so much Christmas people won’t know what to do with themselves.”
“Always,” she says adamantly.
Near bursting with holiday spirit now, I hang up and go sit by the Christmas tree to write a response to my secret admirer. I’m feeling so festive, I scrawl it into a Christmas card.
CHAPTER 4
ENZO
She’s a virgin.
She’s looking for a random man to deflower her.
She wants it to happen soon.
The note had fluttered from my stiff fingers and blown away on a cold breeze too fast for me to catch it.
I don’t know why it bothers me. I don’t even know this woman’s name, and I’m positive she’s a pain in my ass. The situation is also none of my business. If she loses her virginity to a random person she doesn’t intend to see again, she’ll be no different from most people.
For me, it was Edie Wheeler at sleepaway summer camp when I was sixteen. We fucked on the ground behind a tree. It lasted for four minutes, and we got covered in poison ivy, so it wasn’t a magical experience I’ll take to my grave. The memory of the poison ivy rash lasted longer.
