Page 7 of Awakened
A switch flipped, and I suddenly needed to be a million miles from him.
I put my hands up to keep him away. “Fuck! You have to go.” A tightness seized my chest, and I struggled to take a full breath.
“Why? Is this about the condom? I can go get condoms.”
I saw red. “No, it’s not about the fucking condom. It’s about the fact that you’re not mine anymore. I’m not yours. This is so fucked up and wrong,” I said, shaking my head in disbelief.
I expected Aiden to see that I was right, but instead, he roared back, “You. Are. Mine. You will always be mine!”
All I could do was keep shaking my head. “What about Whitney? She’s your mate. She’s yours. You’re hers.” Looking away, I swallowed. “I have no one.”
Finally, Aiden was quiet. We sat side by side on the edge of the bed for a while, just catching our breath.
I didn’t fight him when he wrapped his arm around my waist, bringing me close.
“I’m so sorry, Celeste. I know that doesn’t mean shit, but I am. I love you and probably always will.” Then, more to himself, he muttered, “Why are mates real? Why aren’t you my mate?”
I stared down at my feet. The only answer I could find was, “I don’t know.”
Aiden eventually got up and got dressed. I put on my fluffy pink robe and walked him back to the living room. At the front door, he pulled me to him. At that moment, I knew this was our real goodbye. There would be no more phone calls, texts, or late-night visits that ripped us wide open.
His lips caressed mine gently, moving with purpose—a bittersweet goodbye. With a resigned sigh, he stepped away. Looking into my eyes, he didn’t say a word. He just turned and walked out the door.
I stood there, for I don’t know how long, crumbling. For somany years, Aiden was my happily ever after. But now I had to forge a new future alone, and I was fucking terrified I would never find that kind of love again.
Completely exhausted, I locked up and turned out all the lights. I trudged up the stairs, climbed into bed, and cried until I finally passed out.
All too soon, the alarm went off at six-thirty a.m., and I crawled to the bathroom to wash away the fresh sheen of sweat covering my skin due to the fantastic hangover I was nursing. While two under-eye masks dealt with my cry-swollen skin, I detangled my long, greasy hair. I eyed the shower, but something stopped me from starting the water.
Still looking and smelling like a gremlin, I shuffled to the kitchen to make coffee. The wasted pot from Aiden’s visit taunted me as I tossed out the cold grounds. Another reminder of what a fool I’d been. Once the coffee was brewing, I changed and shoved my dirty clothes into a basket.
There was a series of loud knocks on the door before it flew open. I met Brandon in the living room, where he scooped me into a bone-crushing hug. “You ready for today?”
“Uh, yeah. Sure.” I patted his shoulder. “Want some coffee?”
Brandon nodded as he set me down. He followed me into the kitchen and plopped down at the small table in the same chair that had been “his” growing up. I brought over two giant mugs of coffee and a plate of the blueberry muffins I’d made before packing up my cupcake pans.
“Oh, these actually look good.” He snatched up a muffin and went to work on the wrapper. “They’re even soft.”
I kicked him under the table and playfully scowled. “Shut it.”
He chuckled and took a big bite, his eyes widening in pleasant surprise. Even annoyed, I was determined to soak up these last moments with my brother. There was no telling how long itwould be before I saw him again. Since becoming beta to Aiden’s dad, Brandon had barely had any time for me, and that was when he only lived three minutes away.
His shaggy brown hair fell into his blue-green eyes, and his dimples flashed as he chewed his muffin. “Quit staring, Les. You’re freaking me out.”
“Sorry, Brand. I just don’t know when I will see you again . . .” I glanced down at the muffin I’d absentmindedly mutilated.
“Oh, come on, you won’t be gone forever. You just need some time.”
I didn’t have the heart to correct him, so I looked past him and changed the subject. “Where should we start? The living room?”
Brandon balled up the paper muffin liner, then quietly said, “Maybe you should start with a shower? No offense, but you’re rank.” A look of concern replaced his smile. “And I can smell Aiden on you. I think Connor and Seth will notice.” I tried to defend myself, but he shook his head. “I’m not going to ask you what happened last night. It’s none of my business. But I don’t want the pack to pick at you.”
An ugly truth crept in. I didn’t want to shower. I liked having Aiden on my skin. But Brandon was right, even if it meant washing away the last bit of my former life.
My eyes narrowed, and Brandon’s hands shot up in surrender. “It’s up to you.”
“I hate it when you’re right.” I got to my feet and dragged my smelly ass upstairs. While I scrubbed my skin raw, removing all evidence of my slip into self-destruction, the front door opened and closed a few times.
