Page 154 of Awakened
“Not really. What is there to say? I lost another person I loved.”
His large, warm hand wrapped around my side, half pulling me, half scooting himself until we were flush against each other. “I’m so sorry. I wish I could’ve done something.” The break in his voice got my attention. He looked at me with so much sorrow. “I would do anything to keep you from feeling like this, Les. I’m sorry you lost him.”
His lips brushed against my temple, and I heated at the contact. Those lips held a power over me that I wasn’t ready to yield to.
“Don’t.” I leaned back but didn’t leave his embrace.
His eyebrows lowered, his face relaxing in resignation. “Sorry.”
“It’s not okay. You’ve lied to me for how long?”
Frowning, he asked, “What are you talking about?”
I flushed angrily and quickly stood, pulling away from his warmth and comfort. “The Howlers Seth. How fucking long have you been with them? How long have you been watching me?”
Seth’s face paled. “Fuck.”
I snorted. “Yeah. Fuck. What’s wrong with you?”
He struggled to his feet. I winced at his clumsy movements, but he deserved to feel a little pain. This whole secret identity game had put me through the wringer.
“Let me explain.”
My hand swept in front of me, offering him the floor.
He ran his fingers through his hair. “I’ve been in training for the Howlers in some capacity since I studied abroad in Italy. Theytapped me as a displaced alpha-to-be. My grandma and grandpa were both Howlers. It’s kind of a family tradition, but I think Grandma would kick my ass if she knew I was involved with them. It wasn’t until I left the Blue Moon Pack that I officially joined.”
“Why-why did you join them?” I felt sick. “Was it me? Was it because of what happened between us?”
“It was you, but not how you think. They wanted you, Les. When you left Kirksville, you got their attention. A powerful she wolf going rogue after being jilted? No contest. They knew you would be an amazing grab. I finally committed to them with the understanding you would be left out.”
I crossed my arms. “Well, that fucking worked.”
He threw his hands in the air, only to grab his side with a wince. “I know. They didn’t keep their word. You’ve done such a good job that they want you as a full member.” He moved closer to me, grabbing one of my hands. “You can’t let them know about your new power. They wouldn’t rest if they knew what you are now.”
How dare he tell me what I should want or act like he knows me.
“And what am I now, Seth?”
His face held nothing but adoration. “More powerful than anyone can imagine. Don’t worry. I’ll keep running interference. They won’t ever know.”
“Have you been watching me this whole time?”
The blush on his cheeks was outrageous. We could’ve roasted marshmallows on them.
“Almost. A little after The Gathering, I was taken off as your handler. When you almost died in Toledo, I forced them to let me take over again.”
Tilting my head, I considered the flustered jerk in front of me. “It was you. You saved me. How many times have you saved me?”
An uneasy laugh passed between his lips. “A few. You’re kindof a magnet for trouble. I eventually left the Mountain Pack so I could focus on watching you.”
“So, you think it’s okay to stalk your friend?”
“What? No! But I wasn’t going to let you go out there by yourself! You accepted more and more dangerous missions. I couldn’t let you face that alone. I’m sorry that I violated your privacy.”
Yanking my hand from his, I gave him my back. “Oh, because sorry makes it all okay. Two years, Seth! That’s so fucked up.”
“I know that. Don’t you think I know that? Two years of watching you but having to keep my distance.”
