Page 94 of Gilded Locks
“Most of them. The Nakamura gardens are actually stunning if you visit during the right season. And Björnholm is beautiful when it’s not hunting season. The Björn family has a daughter my age. Was my age. She doesn’t speak anymore.” Katya’s fingers trembled on her book. “That’s what these islands do. They take things from you piece by piece until you’re not sure what’s left. My brother’s never wanted that sort of crime here. They take pride in making sure every guest abides their rules.”
Marigold lowered her gaze. “Until Jordan.”
“Your brother was never meant to be here. Hunter will never forgive himself for allowing him through the doors. But it was my fault for venturing out of my wing during a party.”
“None of this was your fault.”
Katya visibly drew in a deep breath, but remained outwardly calm. “It’s hard to imagine what I was like after. What I became. All of my innocence vanished in a blink. I was so ashamed, so afraid of what they would say, who they might blame.”
“Did they blame you?”
“Never. I think, on some level, my brothers’ devastation runs deeper than my own. They saw it as a personal failure on their part.”
She could imagine as much. All three men prided themselves on being great protectors. To have their little sister attacked right under their roof, in this fortress they called home, it must have been an incredibly humanizing moment for all of them.
“Life has a surrealness about it after something like that,” Katya continued. “Like a living dream. Or a nightmare.” She laughed without humor. “Sometimes I think I’m going crazy, lost within the strange thoughts running through my head.”
“I know what it’s like to live in an unfathomable reality,” Marigold whispered. “I know what it’s like to question yourself so much that you lose your grasp on life. Truth loses meaning, and lies carry a tangible weight. It’s like you’re falling every day, through time with no landing in sight.”
“Yes.”
“You can’t trust your mind.”
“But you feel it. Here,” Katya said, resting a hand on her chest.
Marigold nodded. “A fragile thread of a lifeline.”
She recalled how some days, her mind was so fried and her drug-induced haze was so heavy, she lost that thread back to reality. Days slipped by, without hope, and with every passing minute, she’d lost her grip on the truth, the likelihood of her staying in that hellhole forever grew.
That’s what happened to the residents there. They once cared, but over time, it became easier to give up. They would rather surrender to numbness than push through the fog to fight for their freedom.
It was the first time she found herself able to think about her time at Whitmore without the creeping panic she usually felt. “The more they tried to help me, the more I felt myself slipping away.”
“Sometimes, grief is so personal, we can only help ourselves,” Katya said. “It seems almost impossible to pick ourselves up when we’re at our lowest. I’ve learned patience like I’ve never known, and my brothers remind me every day to give myself grace.”
Marigold smiled and the image of the boys speaking with Katya in such a supportive way. She knew a side to them Marigold had yet to meet, a side she desperately wanted to know. “You’re lucky to have such kind, protective brothers.”
“I’m grateful for them every day. They never doubted me or blamed me for what happened. At the clinic, they said I was having delusions. Trauma-induced paranoia.” Katya’s fingers twisted in the silk of her dress. “They said memories aren’t reliable after too much emotional stress.”
“But you knew better.”
“I knew what he did to me.” Katya’s words were barely a whisper. “I knew how he smiled while he... I couldn’t move, couldn’t fight, couldn’t even scream. By crippling my other senses, he made my mind that much sharper. I’ll never forget what really happened that night.”
Marigold’s chest tightened with familiar rage. “I’m so sorry he did that to you.”
She smiled, but it didn’t reach her green eyes. “I typically stay in the east wing when they entertain. Stone vets everyone on the guestlist of every event, but somehow he got past their checkpoint unnoticed. When they realized he was here without the proper vetting, Hunter let him stay.”
Marigolds heart pinched for Hunter, imagining how much he must blame himself for what she went though.
“He wasn’t with the other guests when he found me. He also had everything he needed to do what he planned.” Her laugh was cold. “To think, I wasn’t even special.”
Marigold’s blood ran cold. “How did he do it?”
“Something in my drink. One moment I was laughing at his jokes, thinking how charming he was, how lucky I was that someone so sophisticated was paying attention to boring little me.” Katya’s voice cracked. “The next moment I was drowning in my own body, aware of everything but unable to do anything to stop it.”
“I’m so sorry, Katya.” Her redundant apology felt so inadequate, but they were the only words Marigold had. Leaning across the space, she placed a hand over hers. “I’m so fucking sorry he did that to you.”
Her palpable sorrow gave way to a slow smile. “You swear like my brothers.”
