Page 24 of Old Girls Go Greek
With this worrying advice echoing in my brain, I had some taramasalata, pita bread and a glass of water. It did strike me halfway through that although it was delicious, it wasn’t the wisest thing to choose. The fishy taste did nothing to calm my uneasy stomach.
Effie seemed not to share my feelings and was tucking in to some dolmades and a glass of wine while the other two shared a platter of Greek snacks.
I looked out at the sea and took a deep breath. It was as Beryl had remarked – half an hour of my life and that was all. And if I didn’t enjoy it, I never needed to do it again.
We paid the bill and carried on down to the harbour.
‘Now then, this is the place, isn’t it?I say,the chap in charge is rather lovely, isn’t he?’ Effie said, stopping suddenly so that we almost cannoned into her.
The man who was hiring out the ringos, the speedboat and my imminent imagined demise was a young Greek god called Tassos, who looked like he had muscles on his muscles. He spoke excellent English and wore white swimming trunks and a t-shirt which was sun and salt bleached but still bore the logoDo not wash, this is my lucky t-shirt, which in a way was mildly comforting. This was topped off with a baseball cap worn backwards which saidDon’t worry, be happy. High chance of sunburn. I grabbed the tube of sunblock and reapplied another layer.
Beryl dealt with all the paperwork and I handed over some euros.
‘I think I’m well outside my comfort zone,’ I said, tugging at the orange life jacket which was threatening to throttle me.
‘I like to think outside one’s comfort zone, a lot of very exciting things are happening. I wouldn’t have climbed Kilimanjaro, gone along the Wall in China or tried wing walking if I’d thought like that. Now then, do either of you know your blood group?’ Beryl murmured, holding up the biro with an enquiring look. And then she smiled. ‘Only joking. Have fun. And don’t forget to wave.’
‘If you do wave, you’re bound to fall off, in my limited experience anyway,’ Effie said as we clambered into the boat and then sped away towards the open sea.
After a few minutes, Tassos stopped and encouraged us over the side and into the inflatables, which were being towed behind the boat on reassuringly strong-looking ropes. It all felt very silly to be leaving the relative security of a boat and getting into a rubber donut, and the whole procedure was accompanied by a lot of shrieking and yelping from us.
‘Will be fine, absolutely safe,’ he said with a grin as he tightened the straps on my life jacket, ‘a lot of fun. Hold on tight, two handles, two hands.’
Effie and I sat, bobbing about in adjacent ringos, floating gently away from the back of the boat. I noticed Effie for all her bravado was clinging to the rubber handles with white knuckles and I did the same, waiting for the moment when the boat would start up.
Tassos gave us a cheery wave and a thumbs up and the boat started to move. Slowly at first and then faster until Effie and I started screaming in harmony as we sped across the blue sea.
When the water was smooth it was almost fun, but when the ringos slid across the wake of the boat, we started to bump about. At one point my craft started to fill with water from the spray, but then it gave an almighty leap across a wave and all the water slopped out into my face. I fell back and my legs flew up into the air over my head and it seemed I was going to completely part company with the boat.
I clung on to the handles, wondering for a moment if it was possible to yank them out altogether, in which case my inflatable would undoubtedly sink and I would be dragged on my face behind the boat on a flapping rubber disaster.
The noise of the boat engine, the rush of the sea, Effie’s whooping and my own screaming effectively drowned out everything. My wet hair was in my eyes and the bottom of my swimming costume seemed to be attached to a pressure washer, which was very uncomfortable.
Why had this been on my bucket list? I might just as well have opened all my windows and let everyone hurl buckets of cold water over me. Or walked into a car wash.
I looked over at Effie, who was making sort of howling noises, her head thrown back, and I realised she was enjoying herself. Outside my comfort zone, what had Beryl said? And suddenly I started to enjoy myself too.
All the same it was terrifying to start with. Wet, cold and noisy but exhilarating. The speed, the blueness of the sea and the brightness of the sun overhead, and I wasn’t sitting in a deckchair sipping a cold drink; I was actually doing something extremely foolish. Something that surely only kids and teenagers would want to do.
It felt marvellous, and then I threw back my head too and gave Effie an echoing howl, and just for a second she turned to look at me and we grinned at each other. Seconds later, our ringos collided and we bumped off each other like some crazy, very wet dodgem cars. And I laughed as I hadn’t done for many years, even when a load of seawater slapped me in the face. It just seemed the most astonishing thing I had ever done.
Perhaps this had been a good idea after all?
* * *
We got back to the harbour at a much slower and more acceptable speed, where we found Beryl and Anita waiting for us and cheering.
‘You were marvellous,’ Anita said. ‘I don’t know how you hung on when your ringo actually took off.’
‘Did it?’ I gasped as I dragged myself up onto dry land again. ‘I don’t think I realised that.’
‘Oh yes, we saw it, clear daylight underneath you,’ Beryl said cheerfully. ‘I’m glad it wasn’t me.’
‘I think we deserve a drink after that,’ Effie said as she hauled herself out of the boat. ‘I feel as though I’ve been through a spin cycle in my washing machine. I’m not sure I will ever get all the water out of my ears, not to mention sundry other places.’
‘Good fun, ladies. Yes?’ Tassos called up at us. ‘Very good fun, you enjoyed it, I know.’
He was coiling up one of the towing ropes as he spoke, obviously getting ready for his next customers, a dad and his teenage son.
