Page 21 of The Dolce Vita Divas
I think if I had been in possession of a Geiger counter, it would have registered something. But I wasn’t sure what it was. I was probably out of practise at recognising those moments. But there was definitely something. But then again, perhaps it was just me, and Paulo was wondering why I was looking so glassy-eyed.
‘And my third husband, dear Freddy…’
‘Mamma, you are a terror,’ Paulo said, turning back to her. ‘I’m sure Ellen’s friends don’t want to hear this.’
‘You’re joking,’ I said, ‘we absolutely do!’
Paulo chuckled and went off back to his other guests. I watched him, perhaps for longer than was strictly necessary. The years had changed him, of course, but I could suddenly remember him so well. How he laughed, how he always walked quickly as though he didn’t want to be late for something, his ability to look as though he was having important thoughts, when in fact he was probably thinking about football.
Ceci sighed. ‘I met Frederico in Monte Carlo. We had such fun, didn’t we? Back then he played the piano and I would sing. I had the voice of an angel, didn’t I, darling? We used to sing all the old songs. And we used to throw parties where one day would melt into another. Do you remember that wonderful time just after you had retired, when we went to Aix, and met up with all your old colleagues?’
Freddy looked thoughtful. ‘I remember fragments. Something about trying to balance on two champagne bottles. Now then, we have this excellent wine, let’s have a toast. To your birthday, my darling, and to Ellen, who we still miss.’
We clinked our glasses together and I took a sip. The new wine was icy cold and refreshing.
‘And you, Jo. Do you have a husband?’ Freddy asked.
‘Not any more,’ I said.
Ceci widened her eyes at me and held out a hand, rotating it slowly, encouraging me to elaborate.
‘He had an affair with his secretary, and at one point he promised to end it if I would take him back, but I realised that I didn’t much like him any more,’ I said, feeling that my marital history was far less interesting than hers.
‘Bene,’ Ceci said. ‘I didn’t really like my first two husbands. I do like this one though. And when the first passions cool, that’s the most important part.’
Freddy smiled happily and blew her a kiss across the table.
I thought about this. Yes, I supposed she was right. Every marriage went through difficult bits. The disagreements about the children, what colour to paint the bedroom. As I remembered, Greg and I had one of our worst arguments about that. How ridiculous.
If I was honest, the passion in our marriage had faded after about two years, and we had been married for over thirty. That was a bit sad. Particularly as when I looked at him in the cold light of day, it was true – I didn’t actually like him much at all.
Ceci wagged a finger at me.
‘You are thinking about that, aren’t you? I can tell.’
‘I didn’t like Simon either,’ Susie said, ‘but he was so charming and handsome and very good in – well, never mind that. I forgave him for a lot.’
Ceci leaned back in her chair and stretched out her arms in front of her. A diamond bracelet flashed on one wrist. A tiny watch sparkled on the other. And I remembered the sapphire engagement ring Paulo had given to Ellen, ‘a family heirloom’.Perhaps it had been one of hers?
‘Meglio soli che male compagnati– better to be alone than in bad company. At my age there is nothing worse than being bored, and Freddy makes sure I am not, don’t you, darling? If I was as young as you, or even ten years younger, I would want to have an adventure, but I have only recently had my cataracts done, and I am not supposed to do anything interesting.’
Freddy patted her hand. ‘When you are properly recovered, we will go to Las Vegas, and you can gamble, and I can stay up all night and watch the showgirls.’
‘That’s a terrible idea on so many levels, and you hardly keep awake until dinner these days,’ Ceci said.
I had a think for a moment while Freddy sneakily topped up our glasses again. It looked as though the bottle was nearly empty.
I couldn’t come up with anything that someone as vibrant as Ceci might consider an adventure but one that didn’t involve – what were people supposed to avoid after a cataract operation – bending over or weightlifting?
‘Perhaps we should go shopping,’ I said.
Ceci pulled a face, and her mouth turned down.
‘I am done with shopping. I have too many clothes already…’
‘You are right,’ Freddy murmured.
‘…things that remind me of the past, that hold so many memories. New fashions don’t hold the same appeal to me now. Colours are so dull,tessuti sintetici– synthetic fabrics are so ugly. Perhaps I have lived long enough. I have done the things I wanted to do, seen all the places, been in love often enough. What is there left to do?’
