Page 55 of Married By Twelfth Night
“Ah, that was clever of you. I thought you were going to hasten my proposal.”
She latched on to the hesitancy in his voice, trying to read through his words. “Not just yet. There is something I must understand first. Do youwantto marry Ruth?”
He opened and closed his mouth twice before he answered. “I didn’t tell you everything about my Aunt Edith’s generous offer. She listed specific qualifications for my bride.”
Grace set her jaw. “Such as?”
“Lives in Wetherfield, musical, reserved, a great reader of philosophy, only passably pretty.” His words slowed as he said that last part, his eyes passing over each of her features.
Did he think her passably pretty? She threw the thought from her head, knowing it did not matter. Had she not heard what he had said? She had to confirm the rest. “That night at the ball. Your riddle was about this, wasn’t it? And I answered Ruth.”
Pain lanced across his face and he dipped a nod. “Yes, it was why Ruth became the object of my attention.”
Grace crushed the sides of her gown beneath her fingertips, not knowing if she should be angry, devastated, or both. “And without Ruth, you lose Belside?” Beautiful Belside. Her second home.
He nodded again, this time with great reluctance. “There is no excuse for any of this. But if it helps, I have been relentless in my efforts to discover a better solution. My aunt is eccentric and determined. Not to mention, the impossibility of arguing with a dying woman, but her offer is greater than any I could discover. There is one venture my solicitor stumbled upon, but I could lose everything. He has advised us to retrench for the next decade and let the house. My mother . . .”
“Your mother would not survive it,” she finished for him. “Not mentally, at least.”
He sighed. “Perhaps not. You know as well as I that she has not recovered from losing Father. I hope her trip to Bath is helping, but I do not expect it to heal her completely so soon. If she leaves Belside, it needs to be her choice, and not out of necessity.” He shook his head. “You must know that I was determined to love Ruth—to do my best by her. Gracie, I did not expect for you and I . . .” His voice trailed off.
He picked up her hands and rubbed his thumbs over the backs of her palms, leaving a trail of heat that she felt all the way to her chest.
“I understand,” she said quickly, fighting the pricking of emotion in her throat. “You’re making the right decision.”
“Am I?” He clung tighter to her hands.
She forced herself to nod. “You’re putting your family and your future as your priority.”
The skin around his eyes pulled tight. “Indeed, my sister’s and my mother’s happiness were the only part that kept me from walking away altogether. I thought my aunt’s will was a blessing I had prayed into existence, but now I feel quite ungrateful. I want much more than amere house for my future. I want a woman who challenges me to be better and makes the hard bearable with one smile. Gracie, I want—”
She cut him off before he could say anything more, knowing it would be too much for her to resist. “You’re running out of time, Richard.” She shook her head. “There are ten days left. That is not nearly enough time to plan a wedding as it is. You have to propose to Ruth straightaway.”
He stared at her like she had suddenly become a stranger to him. He dropped her hands like two hot coals and sat back.
If he couldn’t figure out how to ask Ruth, then she would help him. “Bring your sister and aunt to dinner tonight. Let her meet Ruth and see you two together. We can still make this work.”
“Gracie—”
The way he said her name caused an ache inside her, but she quickly cut him off. “No, Richard. You cannot change this. Remember our near scandal? We could have prematurely killed her with the shock we gave her. Your aunt despises me now, and I cannot blame her. But she will adore Ruth. Think of your family and your home. Our hearts will sort themselves with time.” The lie burned on her tongue. She knew her own heart would never be the same. And by the pain behind his eyes, she knew she had wounded him. Of all the mean, flippant things she had said over the years, nothing had affected him as this.
Ruth and Mama walked into the drawing room. As she pulled away from him, she whispered, “Dinner. Please say you’ll come.”
Chapter 23
Richard shut himself inhis bedchamber the moment he returned to Belside. He unlocked his desk drawer and dug out the letter hidden inside. Out of the corner of his eye, his letter from his mother laid on the desk already, still unanswered. The precarious future of his home had left him with too much guilt to know how to respond. Ignoring it, he read through his aunt’s stipulations again, searching for a turn of phrase or wording that he could bend to allow him the freedom to marry Grace instead.
Despite his hopes, there was nothing there to save him.
She did not meet his aunt’s qualifications, but she certainly met his.
If only that was enough.
He dropped the letter and slumped into his chair. He had wanted Grace to give him permission to give up on Belside, to retrench, and to marryher. No, he hadn’t just wanted it—he had expected it. Grace wasn’t like all the other debutantes. She was resilient, brave, bold. She could thrive no matter her circumstances. He truly believed that.
But she was also loyal, and she loved his sister and mother as much as he did. He also wanted to be an honorable man and keep his responsibilities. Grace would never let him be anything less.
But had Grace accurately read his feelings in his eyes? He wanted to speak them out loud, but if he could not have her, it was better for her not to hear them. It wouldn’t be fair to Ruth. Whomeverhe married he would devote himself to. His father might have been terrible with money, but he had at least taught him the importance of being a faithful husband.
