Page 56 of The Lady Glass
“Do you have any regrets?”
He slowly but deliberately turned his head from side to side. “It gave me a purpose I didn’t have before. I was too much in my own head, worrying about a future already set for me, and giving myself for a cause and for my men was a gift.” Saying it out loud set some of his own concerns to right. In some ways, he’d wondered if he’d run away to fight, instead of fighting for the right reasons. Now he knew it was likely both. Admitting it removed his worries. No matter his initial reasons, it had changed him for the better.
“Are you on leave because of your shoulder?”
He flexed his arm involuntarily. “If I was going to get hurt, you would’ve thought it would be in a skirmish. I’d have a noble death along with the men we lost along the way. This, however, was an accident. A sailor drank far more than his rum ration, and in his drunken state, he broke a lantern. He nearly died, and so did I trying to save him. I’m fortunate to still have my arm, and extra thankful for a good first lieutenant who dowsed me with water before my face was burned too. The unfortunate sailor did not fair nearly as well.”
“I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine the pain either of you endured.” She set her hand briefly on his arm, but her touch was gone too soon.
“I’ve seen far worse, unfortunately. The horrors of war are great indeed. But talking about it with you reminds me to be grateful for surviving. I didn’t always feel that way. I’m not even sure I could until now.”
“You should be very grateful. All life is a gift.” She paused. “Your memories must be hard to run from though. Do you... do you have nightmares?” She stole a glance at him.
“Sometimes.” He’d never told anyone before. “Darkness tends to leave a mark on the mind.”
“How do you rid yourself of it?”
Their hands brushed again, and this time he let his hand linger by hers, warmth radiating from his fingers and up his arm. Why did he not value walking more? It was going to be his new favorite pastime, so long as Theresia was with him. “I’m learning that the only way to chase away darkness is the same way the sun clears a storm. One must immerse themselves with light thoughts and memories of better days.” He met her gaze. “Lately I’ve tried something new and surprisingly helpful. I’ve surrounded myself with someone who trips thieves, constantly puts her and my own reputation at risk, and gallivants at house parties full of potential criminals.” He paused before adding, “And somehow she manages to look quite fetching in the process.”
A slow, steady grin bloomed on her face, glimmering with a hint of mischievousness. It made his reckless confession about his attraction to her worthwhile.
“No wonder you are so quick to try to cheer me up. It’s for selfish reasons.”
The most selfish he had been in years, and he refused to think of the consequences. His lips pulled into a half smile. “You finally figured it out.”
Somehow this unassuming woman had sneaked into his heart with the same stealth as she had his bedchamber. He hadn’t seenit coming. But for just a single moment, he wanted her to stay there.
The path narrowed again, and because Theresia’s eyes were on his, she did not step out of the way in time. Her hair snagged on a small branch of an overgrown blackberry bush. She caught her lip between her teeth and hissed in pain. She threw her arms up to untangle it, but it was clear she needed assistance.
“Hold still.” He stepped in front of her and took the gnarled twig from her hand. It was entangled worse than he’d first thought. Out of necessity, he inched closer. Her head rested against his chest, making it difficult to concentrate on rescuing her hair. The brown tresses were as soft as he’d remembered. He cleared his throat. “How does a woman manage so much hair?”
“I hope that’s a compliment.”
“If I had a knife, I could just—”
“No, no. That will not be necessary.”
He chuckled. “I shall do my best not to risk a single hair.” Especially since each strand carried the heady floral scent he was coming to love.
“Did you get it out yet?” She shifted and winced.
He tugged a pin loose so the hair wouldn’t rip out when she moved. “Almost done.”
A rustle sounded behind them.
“Rolland?”
They both turned to see his parents step into the trees. Her hair was finally freed, but not in time for Rolland to move from his incriminating position.
Chapter 26
Theresia’s immediate response upon seeingLord and Lady Barrack was to flee backward and put as much distance as possible between her and Rolland. Rolland was thinking far more rationally, and his sudden clasp on her elbows kept her from catapulting back into the brambles. Once she was steady, he promptly released her. His posture went straight and rigid, as if his father were a great admiral calling Rolland to attention.
“What is going on here?” Rolland’s father guided his wife through grass and a carpet of ivy between the trees and stopped when they reached the path just ahead of them.
Theresia’s hand went to her destroyed coiffure, and she knew exactly what his parents imagined had happened. Flames erupted on the balls of her cheeks. She’d been in plenty of compromising situations since coming to Westmorland, but this, in all its innocence, seemed the most condemning.
“He . . . I was just . . . then he . . .” Could she not speak a single coherent word?
