Page 70 of Whiskey Throttle
“I thought I was giving in return?”
Her hands reach for me, seeking connection. I catch them in mine, clasp them together, and hold them in front of her.
“I thought so too.”
My cock is deflated along with my ego. Usually, I’m in charge with women. At least sexually. But not with Babs. I’m the one with the dick, but she’s the cock. She sees the shift in my demeanor, and her expression softens.
“Hollister, I was just having a bit of fun. I didn’t mean to actually upset you.”
I release her hands, stepping back to create some space between us.
“Fun at my expense. I get it. You’re good at games, Barbara. Better than me.”
She reaches out, her fingers brushing against my chest.
“That’s not what this is about. I just wanted to draw it out, to make it last. I didn’t want it to be over so quickly.”
I run a hand through my hair, frustration ebbing slightly at her touch. I thought I could handle her. Last night and today, I’ve never been on such rocky ground. Massimo’s comments from earlier run through my mind. But maybe I rushed this. Maybe I’m catching feelings way too quickly. I’ve overblown this whole thing into something else. I like her, but I’m hoping to grow this, and she’s playing me for a fool.
Fuck that.
“Well, congratulations. It’s not over quickly. It’s just over.”
Her eyes widen in surprise as I yank up my pants and step away. Picking up the bows from the floor, I hang them back on the wall. Her hand touches my bicep when I’m done.
I turn to face her.
“You don’t mean that,” she rushed out, reaching for her necklace and coming in contact with mine. She fingers the shape for a second before her hand falls away.
I shrug, not sure what I mean anymore.
“Maybe I mean we should just stop. It’s all fun and games until it’s not.” I step away from her, picking up the dress and handing it to her. While she’s dressing, I continue. “It’s not fair.”
I can’t just turn it off and on with her. Her edging me seems more punishing than playful. More importantly, she determines our pace and what happens. Leaving me clueless and looking like a love-starved idiot, which I won’t do.
Needing a moment to regroup, I walk over to the bar at the end of the range. It’s early as hell for a whiskey, but I pour one anyway. If I can’t get off, at least I can get drunk. Maybe Em is the only one who has it all figured out. Get shitfaced with a bachelorette group, get laid, and go home. Sans digging imaginary worms out of my stomach.
I down half of it. The liquid burns down my throat, but does nothing to dispel the negativity growing in my heart after being taken for a fool. Taken for granted. One thing I don’t do is second-guess myself, yet that’s all I’ve been doing since meeting her.
If it weren’t bad enough, I’ve been intentionally lying to Dominic. Not outright, but stalking his mom behind his back. Now seeing her and doing unthinkable things with her. Hiding, lying, and being deceptive all over the place. The guilt from my actions is flooding in and overtaking my thoughts.
Who’s the fucking fool now?
CHAPTER 18
BABS
I don’t let him get three steps away from me before I start moving. Dress half on, hair a mess, and my heart pounding. He’s hunched over a tumbler like it’s the only thing in the room that won’t turn on him.
I’m unsure what’s going on. Somehow, I took it too far. Never have I had a man with that sort of reaction. I never expected this. I’m completely caught off guard.
“Tell me why you’re angry.”
I carefully approach the bar, wanting to work this out.
“And be brutally honest when you do.”
The second part is an afterthought. He’s been honest with me as far as I can tell, especially yesterday when he mentioned it being more than just a weekend fling. He sets the glass down harder than necessary. The whiskey sloshes, but he doesn’t even flinch.
