Page 37 of Falling Hard
When I finally made it to the little bar, I was panting. I took a deep breath and pushed the door open. The place was crowded. All around, men in suits shouted over each other, some drinking beers, others something harder, to forget the long work day. Frantically, I scanned the chaos, desperate to find him. Seconds passed, and I couldn’t see Luke. He wasn’t here. I felt like crying on the spot.
And then I saw him in the very back, beer in hand, just as my heart nearly gave out.
Luke looked up, and we locked eyes, his squinting into confusion as I approached. Each step was scarier than the one before, but I kept going.
"Liv, what are you doing here?"
"She came for a good time," his coworker, who I'd met previously, said with a slimy smile that made me wonder if we'd fucked before. I couldn't remember.
"Can we talk?"
"Okay."
I looked around us. "Maybe outside. I have something to say."
"Why are you so serious, Olivia? That's not like you," the coworker I couldn’t name said.
Luke stood, "Guys, I'll see you Monday."
He slid a firm hand around my arm and guided me through the crowded bar. The heat of his touch mixed with my nervescreated a dangerous combination. Every step I debated running, but the rush up my spine from his touch reminded me that this was what I wanted: for Luke to never let go.
Once outside, he studied me. "What is it? Is something wrong? Did you talk to Demetria?"
Luke stared at me. His expression was so caring.
"Demetria? What? No. Well, I just ..." My stomach twisted, and I closed my mouth. There was no going back after this.
He wore a puzzled expression but patiently waited for me to continue.
"Luke, I haven't been honest with you ..." I stopped and tried to steady myself. My hands were clammy, and my heart was racing. How could I put myself through this again?
"Liv, you're scaring me. Are you sick?"
"What? No."
Luke's shoulders relaxed, and I tried again. "This is harder than I expected," I said, then started to walk. He followed close by.
Luke chuckled. "Let me guess, you’re here to badmouth Solenne and tell me not to marry her."
"Yes, I don’t think you should marry Soufflé, not because she’s a gold digger, or pretentious. Only for one damn reason."
"What?"
I could barely breathe; the words were caught in my throat, but I exhaled. "Because she isn't me."
Luke blinked as if he wasn’t sure he’d heard me right, then his brow drew together in a slow, uncertain frown. I felt transported back to college and began to shake. Luke's mouth parted, but when he shut it again, I figured he was at a loss for words. Time stretched on as we just stared at one another.
However, I could read the shock etched across his face. "What?"
"Oh god, the first time was hard enough, please don't make me say it again."
Luke's eyes widened, and a scowl covered the lower half of his face. "You wait until I'm engaged to tell me this shit."
Of all the things I expected, anger wasn't on my list.
"This tracks. You were always like this. A woman like Solenne is willing to be my wife, and you can’t handle that. You’re doing this out of spite? Out of jealousy? Right?"
"That's not fair. Years ago, I told you how I felt, and you rejected me."
