Page 10 of Something to Believe In
Chapter Eight
Maddyn's stomach was in knots. Everyone was quiet, not listening to what was going on outside, but not wanting Lacey to think she was missing anything. Or maybe they were listening. She wanted to listen. Then, ugly thoughts started running through her head. Were they kissing right now? Was he touching her? Were they having sex?
With that last thought, she felt queasy but wasn't sure what to do. She certainly couldn't step outside to get fresh air. Seeing what they were doing would likely make her vomit for sure. She excused herself to go to the restroom. Her legs were shaky as she walked to the right of the bar, where the bathroom was. Locking the door behind her, she leaned her back against the door, grateful it felt cool. Taking deep breaths, she let them out slowly, then tears spilled from her eyes. She wouldn't be able to do this. Which wasn't fair at all. She'd just broken up with Doug. Though he was an asshole, she had had a boyfriend, and Axel was always cordial whenever Doug was around. Until yesterday. And over the years, Axel had had girlfriends. Though she could always tell he wasn't serious about any of them. She and Axel had always had a great friendship. The rule had always meant they kept their private lives separate, and that was that. Why were things different now?
It was the passion he'd shown yesterday that let her believe he felt differently about her than anyone else in the band. It had been only recently since they began writing and recording songs together that the creative fuel had turned the romantic feelings on. She'd been seeing him clearly now. Not the drummer. The man. When he was drumming, she fantasized about his arms wrapping around her. The muscles bunched and moved with every beat of his drum. The fine sheen of sweat that defined those muscles incredibly under the lights made her body respond in ways it never had before. She'd feel vibrations and sensations between her legs with every hit on the drum. She went home every night, so worked up and horny she couldn't stand it. But Doug was there, not Axel, and as soon as she saw him, her libido took a nosedive. Doug noticed it too. It was then that he began hitting her.
Was there a counselor she could see about this? A book, How Not to Fall in Love with Your Co-worker? Therapy? Short of quitting the band, what could she do?
She heard the barn door open and close and heard her bandmates chattering. Stepping to the mirror, she cleaned up her face. Blowing out a breath, she opened the door and strolled back to her barstool.
Gloria was watching her as she neared. Maddyn looked away to find Axel back behind the bar, talking quietly to Tony and Jami.
Sean stepped over to Gloria. "I'm ready to go home, baby."
"Me too." Gloria nodded.
The twosome stepped out of the bar and waved before leaving. Maddyn took a deep breath and sat on her barstool next to Livia.
"You, okay?" Livia asked.
"Yeah. Why?"
"It looks like you were crying."
She shook her head. "Doug's just being Doug again. I'm okay."
"You broke up with him, didn't you?"
"Yes. He's not taking it well, though."
Livia nodded and took a drink, and Maddyn worked hard not to look at Axel. The fact was, Doug hadn't so much as tried to reach out to her, and she was grateful for that.
Tony left his conversation with Jami and Axel and moved toward Livia. "Ready?"
Livia chuckled. "Yeah. See you tomorrow, Mads."
"You bet. Have a great rest of your night."
Jami followed closely behind them. "I'm done for the night. See you two tomorrow."
"Bye, Jami," she blurted, then stood to leave, too.
Axel straightened. "You want another one, Mads?"
"Oh, I'm not sure I should. I have to drive."
"How about a water then?"
She looked into his eyes, those soulful brown eyes, and her head nodded.
She watched him pull a bottle of water from the cooler and meander with it around the bar. He set the water in front of her. Slowly, he turned her stool to face him. He smelled good. Hints of his aftershave combined with the sweat from playing hard earlier. They all worked up a sweat when they performed. It was heady. Her nipples pebbled as he stepped between her legs.
His fingers brushed across her cheek. Sliding into her hair at her nape. They were firm but touched her so softly. She felt a rush zing through her body, landing between her legs. She wet her lips with her tongue, and his nostrils flared. He pulled her to him, gently but firmly, until their lips touched.
Her fingers shook as she wrapped them around his waist. He used his other hand to slide up her leg to her back and pulled her forward, pressing her body tightly to his.
His lips played on hers. Softly, then so demanding. Moving and pressing tightly. His tongue slid between her lips, and hers mimicked his. They danced together, tasting and touching everywhere. His hands found her breasts and squeezed them. His fingers slipped under her bra and found her nipples. They were so hard and firm that when he touched them, she groaned.
