Page 11 of Left of the Slash
“I understand that,” I say. “I’m the same way.”
“Is that so?”
“Yeah. You're work obsessed because of the way your father raised you, and I'm work obsessed because I'm trying not to end up like my dad.”
Olivia giggles. “Oh, so we both have daddy issues?”
“I wouldn't word it like that,” I say with a chuckle. “But I guess that’s something you could say.”
“Why don't you want to be like your dad? If you don't mind me asking?”
I suck my bottom lip into my mouth as I exhale, suddenly uncomfortable with the question. It’s one thing to talk about this with Marcus and Rob, but totally different discussing it with anybody else. I just met Olivia, so I do mind her asking.
“Umm, just some personal stuff,” I answer, choosing my words carefully because emotion always floods my system when talking about my past, and it takes a dam to hold them back. “My dad didn't die, but he's in prison serving life, which is practically the same thing.”
Olivia’s hand snaps up to her mouth. “Oh. I'm so sorry to hear that. What did he do?”
“Nothing I'm willing to talk about,” I reply quickly. It comes out harshly and I immediately feel a stab of regret. “I apologize. Touchy subject.”
Olivia shakes her head. “No, it’s fine. I totally understand. Daddy issues, am I right?”
I don't want to smile, but seeing her shrug and tilt her head forces one out of me. “Yeah, I guess so. No wonder we’re both single.”
“There are a lot of reasons that I'm single,” Olivia says. “My daddy issues are just one of them. If you couldn't already tell, I'm not your average girl. I work with men who don't like working with women, let alone workingfora woman. Over the years, I've grown some pretty thick skin. It has made me a bit cold.”
“But is that who you are on the inside?”
She shrugs. “I'm not sure I know anymore. My dad told me I needed to harden myself in order to be successful as a woman, so that’s what I did. Deep down … I’ll just say there's another side of me that most people never get to see.”
I smirk, because nothing would bring me more just than seeinganotherside of Olivia. On the other hand, I can relate.
“I feel you,” I say. “We all have sides of us that we don't wanteverybodyto know about. I have another side, too. A side that grew as a result of my past, and it’s darker than anything I get to bring inside the office, that’s for sure.”
“Darker, huh? What kind of darkness are we talking about, Quinn? I don't have to worry about you shooting up the place, do I?”
I scoff and laugh at the same time. “Nah, it’s not that kind of darkness.”
“Oh? What kind is it, then? Maybe it’s the same shade as mine?”
I pause, my eyes locking onto Olivia as she stares back at me, clearly unbothered by the conversation switching from the breach to our personal lives. I told myself not to come in here on this type of timing because she's my boss, but if it doesn't bother her, then it certainly won't bother me. My foot was already halfway through this door anyway, but I pulled it back out in an attempt to remain professional. But fuck it.
“Nah,” I say, dragging the word out. “My shade is definitely darker than yours.”
Olivia raises an eyebrow. “I'm not so sure.”
We lock eyes for a moment, both of us thinking private things about the other person and unable to hide it from our faces. I see the curious look in her eyes as she stares at me, and I'm just as curious about her. Who is this person? I don't know almost anything about her, but what I can tell so far is that she is definitely not a typical CEO. I think we’re both hiding something, but I keep my dark devil in a cage because I'm afraid of what it will do. I wonder why she’s hiding hers.
Who are you, Olivia? I'm not talking about the persona you wear like clothing to the office. I'm not referring to the CEO your father envisioned. I mean deep down. What do you not want people to see? Who is the real Olivia Lucero?
After a moment of silence, Olivia realizes that I'm not looking away. She keeps staring at me, and I stare right back, embracing it instead of shying away, and I watch her eyes flutter when she gets it. It’s obvious that she’s used to controlling the room and intimidating people with her demeanor and direct eye contact, a typical boss trick that works for most. But it doesn't work on me. Even if she was a man, I’d risk my job before allowing myself to feel submissive to anyone. But since it’s her, my intrigue won't let me look away. I need her to know that I'm not like whatever else she's used to.
She slowly leans back in her seat, clears her throat, and glances down at the desk before looking back up to me, the curious look in her eyes vanishing fast. “Umm. Anyway, let’s uhh … we can … let’s just plan to meet up again when you find out something new. You can email me directly instead of having to go through Jon.”
I raise my eyebrows. “That would be jumping the chain of command. Is that what you want?”
She glances down at the table again, showcasing a new tell that I bring out of her when she has to say something different than what she's thinking.
“Would that be a problem for you?” she asks.
