Page 81 of A Good Girl's Guide to Dominance
“My heart split in two—one side for the woman I married, the other for you. I panicked, worried that I was disrespecting Natalia on the anniversary of her death, while also fearing that loving you would mean losing you to an early grave the same way I lost both parents and my wife. I fell into a pit of despair and let the darkness swallow me whole, and it took my closest friend to pull me out of it. I clung to him the same way you're clinging to your friends now, and he beat the truth out of me. He asked me how I would respond if my parents asked if I was in love with you, and answering him felt like I was really responding to them. The answer was yes. Yes, I was … Iamin love with you, Nia. Right here at this very moment, and saying that I don't care who knows it would be a lie, because I do care. I wanteveryoneto know that I'm in love with you. You, your friends, and perfect strangers. I want them all to know.”
I quickly wipe away the tears that refuse to stay in my eyes, and let out a long breath.
“And what about your fear? You said you feared losing me the same way you lost them. How do you feel about that now?”
“Fuck fear,” he answers quickly. “I'd rather risk it all for us, than live a full life knowing I gave up on the best thing to ever happen to me. Fear will not keep my love for you at bay.”
“I don't want to compete with Natalia, Rome.”
“And you never will. I promise you, Nia. Because of you, I'm finally ready to move on. I'm sorry I hurt you, and I'm begging you in front of people I don't know to forgive me. I love you, Nia Washington, and I’ll never want happiness again if it isn't with you.”
Try as I might, my anger gives way to the flood of emotions when I turn around and see everyone standing behind me with tears in their eyes. Jaz covers her mouth with her hand, while Michael puts his head down so that his tears are barely visible in the dark. Jeremiah wipes away a tear before nodding his approval, and even the four strangers fight back tears of their own. Each of them nods to me, not needing to say a word to let me know that even though they don't know Rome, they can see his sincerity.
When I turn around, Rome stands in the exact same place. He hasn't stepped forward, assuming that his groveling would result in instant forgiveness. Instead, he waits for me, his eyes filled with hope and anxiousness at the same time, and the only fear I see in him now is the fear of losing me.
I have new fears of my own. I’m terrified that I will always compete with the woman he lost five years ago. I worry that he’ll always have anxiety in the back of his mind when it comes to how long we will last, and I'm horrified by the possibility ofbeing hurt all over again. But all of that pales in comparison to how much I want him. From the moment he strutted into Sandcastle, I have wanted to be with him, and I know that turning him away now would be something I would regret for the rest of my life. I won't allow myself to be that dumb.
“Are you one hundred percent sure?” I ask, my feet already anxious to inch forward.
“I've never been more sure about anything in my life,” he answers confidently.
As the final barrier over my heart falls, I run to him, throwing my arms around Rome as our lips connect for the first time in far too long. He spins me around while kissing me, making the entire scene feel like a fairytale getting its happy ending.
“I love you,” I say when I manage to pull away.
“I love you, my little goddess,” he answers.
Our makeshift audience begins to applaud, and I turn to see smiling faces and tears of joy from everyone. My heart sings with happiness as Rome puts me down and kisses me again. Even though my feet are on the ground, I'm still floating on a cloud.
“So, is it safe to assume that you don't need a ride home?” Michael says, chuckling to himself.
I look at him and grin, my eyes still watering. “I appreciate it, Michael, but I’ll be going home with Rome.”
Forty-Four
My mind and heart race as the cloud I've been floating on since the restaurant stays beneath my feet, carrying me from Rome’s car to the inside of his house, where we kiss the second the door is closed. After four days, our bodies have clearly spent enough time apart to develop withdrawal, now we’re desperate to binge on each other.
Rome and I stay connected, our hands pulling us closer, our mouths never parting as we bump our way through the house. We crash into furniture, bounce off the corner of a wall, and knock a few picture frames crooked, but we eventually reach our destination and stand at the top of the stairs that lead to his playroom.
“We don't have to do this,” Rome says, even as he kisses me on the neck and I'm distracted by the erection in his pants. “I didn't bring you back here for this.”
“No?” I ask, my neck arched to give him easier access to it. “What’d you bring me back for?”
“Because I love you, and I was going to die if I didn't have you near me. We’re back together, and that is all I needed. You belong to me again.”
“Forever?”
He keeps kissing, making his way up to my ear, where whispers, “For fucking ever.”
I know I could go the more romantic route. I could choose to lay with him on the couch and watch movies while we drink wine. I could lay on my stomach in his bed while he massages my back and shoulders. We could simply cuddle, our fingers caressing each other’s skin while we bask in a bliss-filled fog of happiness. There are a lot of things we could do after reuniting tonight, and I know Rome is in the headspace of a remorseful Dom who is willing to put aside all of his desires to do whatever makes his sub happy. But the truth is that there is only one thing I want right now, and he and I both know it’s the only way for us to reconnect properly.
I put my hand on the doorknob and push it open. “Take me to the playroom, Sir.”
Rome’s eyes darken as he grins. “With pleasure, my little goddess.”
He takes me by the hand and leads me down the stairs step by step, and the second we reach the bottom Rome spins around and pins his mouth to mine. His aggressiveness returns now that I have given him permission, and we kiss our way through the playroom until he brings us to a sudden stop. Without hesitation, I immediately remove my clothes and begin lowering myself to my knees in front of him, in a rush to submit and allow my Dom to use my consent at his leisure. But as I drop down, Rome places a hand beneath my chin and lifts me back up.
“No,” he tells me. “Don't kneel. Stand … and back up.”
