Page 26 of Interview with a Sadist
“How does someone like that end up single?” Ethan asks his husband.
Jackson scoffs. “You know why.”
“Wait, can I know why?” I jump in with a raised finger.
The two of them glance at each other, silent words being exchanged back and forth. It’s Jackson who answers after their muted conversation.
“Like I said before, Nolan can be a lot to take. He’s honest about who he is, and if he gets the sense that you’re not, then getting his approval can be difficult. For some people, gaining his approval is all that matters, and that can be a problem, because if he doesn’t trust your motives, you’ll never get it.”
Intrigue comes to life in my heart and spreads to the rest of my body through my veins. You can never judge a book by its cover, but I never would’ve guessed that Nolan had so many layers. He’s a walking enigma, and the more I learn about him, the more drawn to him I feel. I want to learn more and more as fast as I can, because the way his friends describe him makes him sound truly special.
They also seem to know his secrets, and I want those too. Especially when I look up and find Maddy watching us again. She stands at the top of the stairs with hatred and heartache in her eyes, and when we make eye contact this time, she doesn’t look away until the sound of Nolan’s office door steals her attention. She spins around, her entire demeanor softening as Nolan strides past the VIP section and starts down the stairs without ever acknowledging Maddy. He’s wearing a black button-up with white pants, all of it tailored to his perfect physique, and as he approaches, he looks me up and down with curiosity in his gaze. He looks just as interested in me as I am in him, and I couldn’t fight off my smile if I tried.
“I hope these two aren’t bothering you too much,” he says, smiling at his two friends.
“No, not at all,” I reply. “I actually learned quite a lot about you.”
“Accusations,” Nolan says, jokingly pointing his finger at E and Jackson. “Falseaccusations.”
“We didn’t accuse you of anything except being awesome,” Ethan jokes, and the three of them laugh together. With these three, their love for each other is on full display. Whereas with my friends, I wonder if people can tell if we even like each other when they see us together.
“Anyway,” Nolan says, holding out his hand to help me off the barstool “If you’re ready, we can head upstairs and begin.”
With a smile and a nod, I clasp my hand in his. “Absolutely.”
Ethan and Jackson smile suspiciously as we turn to walk away, but Nolan doesn’t acknowledge them. He guides me up the stairs, never letting go of my hand, even as we pass a glaring Maddy who watches us until we enter his office. Her eyes stay fixated on us until the moment Nolan escorts me inside and slowly closes the door behind us. Even through the wooden door, I can feel her still watching.
ChapterSeventeen
My nerves vibrate beneath my skin, because I’m more anxious now than I’ve ever been. Nolan sits across from me with that same sultry, seductive, awe-inspiring look on his face, and it melts my insides. He’s so gorgeous—so poised and sure of himself that it makes me feel like I have no control over myself. If he is what self-control looks like, then I certainly don't have any, because Nolan is the essence of calm. I want to rile him up just to see what he’s like when he’s not so collected, but he looks at me with unmoving eyes, completely unfazed. Knowing I can’t break him makes me wonder what it would feel like to be brokenbyhim.
Shit. There go those impulsive thoughts again. I’ve been occupied by them all day, and now that I’m sitting in front of the man who helped me open the portal to them, it’s only getting worse. When he looks at me, I can envision myself strapped to one of the Xs in the impact room, waiting as he stalks behind me with something dangerous in his hand. I don't even know what he’s holding, and my every breath is laced with fear, but my blood flows faster than ever. I crave it. I lust after learning the unknown—what will the pain be like? How can it feel so good?
“You seem distracted,” Nolan says, his words like a knife through the soft butter he turns my thoughts into.
I clear my throat and try to refocus, but allowing myself to be more open has altered my mind and body. Sitting in front of Nolan now isn’t the same as when I was fighting how I felt before. Now, there’s a constant current flowing through me. I’m more tense and on edge.
“I’m okay,” I lie.
“Good. So, how do we begin? If I’m not mistaken, this is supposed to be our final interview, is it not?”
I clear my throat again to settle myself, because the thought of walking away from all of this makes my stomach hurt. I haven't experienced enough yet. So, this may be the final portion of the interview, but it’snotour last interaction. Therehasto be more.
“Yes. After the depth of our first interview, and the amazing things you showed me last night, thisshouldbe the end. I expect to have enough to write a thorough, detailed story about you and The Black Collar, and I imagine it will set our readers’ worlds ablaze. I'd expect a spike in sales after this is published."
Nolan chuckles, raising his eyebrows. “Wow. You must have some pretty nice things to say about me then. I can’t imagine people flocking to a BDSM club because of a story in The Inquirer. No matter what you write, people will still find a reason to hate a lifestyle they don't live themselves. It’s just the way things work in the world we live in.”
“Maybe that’s true,” I reply, setting my recorder on the table. “But I’m following your lead, Nolan. If we flood them with the correct information and they still hate it, it’s onthem, but at least they’ll be educated about it. I want to enlighten the world about what I’ve experienced here, because it has been truly eye-opening.”
“I’m glad to hear you say that, Bree,” Nolan responds with a smile. “As much as you’ve seen, there's so much more to it than that.”
“I know,” I say, maybe a little too quickly. “I … umm. I’m intrigued by all of it, actually.”
He goes still, his eyes fixated on me while the gears in his head go to work like they always do, leaving me to wonder what he’s thinking. Most people would just come out with it, but he is nothing like most people. He is a vault with a code that only he knows. He may open it enough to give you bits and pieces of the contents inside, but you’ll never step in and see it for yourself.
“Anyway,” I say, trying to move past the fact that he is still staring at me. “Shall we begin?”
Nolan finally blinks. “Absolutely.”
