Page 30 of Kingpin
Alannah
“Three, two, one. Happy New Year!”
The glasses tink together and there’s plenty of hugs as a big 2016 flashes on the screen over and over again. There’s confetti and kisses, and my parents’ house never looked so full of joy. It’s January first, 2016, and I feel more anxious than ever about the future.
“Alright, alright, everybody gather around,” my mother says, interrupting the happiness. Everyone quiets down and gives her their attention. “Okay, so now that we’ve brought in the New Year, it’s time for the second reason we’re here tonight.”
The twenty-or-so people in the room all seem to turn to me at the same time. They know what she’s talking about, and I feel a wave of heat rush over me.
“As you all know,” my mom continues, her purple dress flowing around her ankles. “Our beloved Alannah is moving away to start her own life in the mid-west, and we wanted to take this opportunity to get together one last time to show her how much we love her, and how much we’re going to miss her when she’s gone. I’m going to be worried to death every single day, but I know she has her mind made up, and she’s going to do big things with her life. So, if you all could raise your glasses one more time for my baby girl, Miss Alannah Sullivan. Cheers.”
The group of friends I’ve made over the past ten years raise their glasses towards me and say “Cheers” in unison, followed by a loud applause I wasn’t expecting.
“Speech!” someone shouts from the back, then a few more people repeat it, egging me on.
“Come on, Alannah. Give us a speech,” my mother says, adding to the peer pressure. Her mascara starts to mix with her tears and streak down her face, but she wipes it away. Ugh, peer pressure is a bitch.
I nod to the group as I step over next to my mom. The room goes silent as I realize I have no idea how to begin.
“Umm. I don’t really know what to say,” I start.
“Well, that’s a first,” Derrick Coleman says from the back, making everyone laugh. I give him a look that saysshut up. Derrick thinks he knows me because we dated a few years back. He doesn’t, which is one of the many reasons we’re not together anymore.
“Umm,” I begin again. “Well, I don’t know. I, uhh, I feel lucky to have lived here in Anchorage all this time. The past ten years of my life have been amazing. I’ve made awesome friends and awesome memories that I’ll never forget. I appreciate all of you being here and being supportive of me moving out to St. Louis all on my own. I know it’s a big change, and it’s scary, but I look forward to it. I think it’ll be good for me to build my own life. I’m going to miss all of you, especially my old college friends, and my girls from the hospital. It’s going to be hard nursing it up in St. Louis without you ladies, and without my mom, but like I said, I look forward to the adventure. Mercy Hospital seems really nice, and they’re anxious for me to get there, so it should be fun.
“I’m going to be in touch with all of you, I swear. I’ll never forget where I came from or the impact all of you have had on my life. I love you all, and I’ll be here to visit all the time, so you better be ready to have a blast when I’m in town.”
“We love you, Alannah!”
“I love you, too, Jessica! Alright, now that’s enough of a speech. I don’t want to start crying. Thank you, guys.”
They all applaud again and pat me on the back as I go hug my mother. She squeezes me like she’s afraid she’ll never see me again once I get on the plane in a few days, and I can tell she’s fighting back her tears. I am too.
It’s been a long road getting to this point. All the relationships—good ones and bad ones—all the school, all the family stuff—good and bad. It’s been an adventure, and Anchorage has become a great home for me and my family. It’s been so good that my dad decided to retire from the Air Force and live here for good, which is why he can’t understand why I want to leave. He’s still supportive, but me moving away is still a sore subject between the two of us.
My father, always the skeptic, believes that I’m only moving back to St. Louis for one reason. Even though I’ve told him he’s wrong, my father is hard-headed, so he just gives me that look and we change the subject.
My mother’s thinking is in line with my dad’s, but she doesn’t give me as much grief about it. I think it’s because she just wants to be supportive of her daughter, just like she always has been. When I told her I wanted to become a nurse like her, she had my back, and gladly paid my way through college so I could get my BSN in nursing and work at Providence Alaska Medical Center with her the past couple of years. Mom has been in my corner the whole time, so the emotion she’s showing tonight isn’t a surprise.
“So, there’s nothing I can do to make you change your mind?” Mom says as she follows me into the kitchen. I put my wine glass in the sink and face her with a smile.
“Not likely,” I reply. “But I’m glad you care so much.”
“Well, I do,” she replies as my dad walks in and stands behind her. He has a stern expression on his face and folds his arms with an attitude. “So, can I ask you a question? And I want you to be honest with me, Alannah. Okay?”
I feel a pang of nervousness hit me. Where is this about to go?
“Kind of freaking me out with the sudden seriousness.”
“Well, me and your dad are just curious about this whole thing. I mean, how do you even know he’s still there?”
My face grows a mind of its own and twists into a confused frown.
“What are you talking about? Who?”
“Don’t play, Alannah,” my father finally chimes in, breaking his night-long silence. I’m still not used to seeing him with a beard, but he’s growing it out since he retired. “Let’s not pretend you’re moving back to St. Louis because you love it there. Let’s just be honest, alright? We know who this is about.”
“Oh my gosh, Dad. I get so tired of having this same conversation,” I snip, folding my arms and mirroring his demeanor. “I’m moving to St. Louis because Mercy Hospital hired me, and I did always like it there, whether you believe it or not. I loved St. Louis, and I didn’t want to leave. So, I’m twenty-five years old now, and I’m moving to a place I know I love. That’s all there is to it.”
