Page 90 of Hesi-Dating
"You look like you turned out okay. Those shoes are wicked." She nodded to my pink sneakers.
"Thanks." I wiggled my feet. "Someday, you too can have everything you want if you work for it. I'm a work in progress."
The door opened and a boy left the therapy room. He didn't look depressed or browbeaten but kind of skipped away, giving us a wave as he passed by.
"Looks like I'm up," the girl said. "I'm Lola."
"I'm Joley."
"Maybe I'll see you around."
"Hey, Lola, next time your foster folks say fuck off and you need something, text me. We foster losers have to stick together."
Distrust transformed her face. "You sure you're not a plant as part of this stupid place?"
"You think I'd be sitting here waiting to get shrinked for kicks and giggles?" I scrunched up my face.
The door opened and a woman who couldn't be more than a year or two older than me stepped out. She smiled at me. "You must be Joley. I'm Lisa White. Amanda said you'd be by this morning. I'm going to talk to Lola for a few minutes. Are you okay to wait until after that and then we'll chat?"
I managed a nod, but I could barely breathe through my panic at the thought of talking about not being able to read.
"Come on in, Lola."
The girl must've noticed my freak-out. When Lisa went back into her room, Lola whispered to me, "Hey, she's nice. Are you okay?"
"I don't know if I can do this," I whispered back. "Seriously. What was I thinking?"
"Gimme your phone. I'm going to put my number in there," Lola said. "You can text me afterward to let me know if you survived. I'll tell Lisa to be nice to you."
I swallowed. "Thanks. Isn't it me who's supposed to be making you feel better?"
She typed in her digits. "I've spent a lot of time with therapists and counselors. None have figured out how to fix me yet, but at least Lisa seems nice about the whole thing."
"If you figure out how to fix everything that messes us up in foster homes that suck, you let me know. The two of us…we're just…I don't know what your foster folks are like, but mine were total shit. I had to stick tight with my foster siblings. We actually all still live together. It's the only way we survive. I meant it when I said if you need something for a project, you let me know. If you just want to have a night away from your fosters, you let me know. My siblings are wildcards, but they're good people."
She smiled. "Thanks, Joley. Maybe I'll see you out here again someday."
I sat there in the quiet wondering if maybe I did have something to give to these kids. Everyone wanted to "fix" us like we had a mental disturbance when the issues were all the minutia at home and a lack of support. There were fosters guardians that were spectacular. Amanda said there were more these days since the requirements to become one had become stricter.
A half hour later, Lola emerged. She had a smile and winked at me as she walked by.
Lisa waved me inside. "I'm not sure what you said to Lola, but…"
My stomach twisted. Had I worsened things?
Lisa grinned. "I've never seen her so confident. She said she'd seen a glimpse of what she could be like by talking to you."
"I'm not sure that's a good thing."
"Somehow, you made her not feel so alone. So thanks. She's been one of the toughest cookies to crack."
"She needs a better place to live, one that's more supportive."
"I agree."
"I hope it's okay that I told her to text me next time she can't get what she needs for a school project. I remember those days when I'd lash out over things that weren't my fault. Kids would make fun of me about stuff all the time. Sucks."
"Amanda is right. I think you can do good things here, Joley."
