Page 56 of Total Eclipse of the Moon
"You didn’t undress him?" he asked.
She stared at the Antonio bundle still on the floor. "I’m not getting near him. Even asleep I don’t trust him."
"One of us should." His shoulders slumped while he stared at the blanket-wrapped vampire as if everything about the task represented the muck of his life.
She moved toward Shane, pulled by forces she couldn’t control. Once close enough, she looped her hands around his neck and over his shoulders to play with his hair. He banded his arm around her to hold her closer.
She gave him a hug.
"Maddy?"
That nickname was absurdly beautiful when he said it.
"I didn’t know I was looking for this. That I needed this," he whispered as he rested his head against the top of hers.
Don’t listen. Don’t get sucked in.But his hands were hot on her skin. She didn’t want to hear what he was saying. She couldn’t think because if she did, she knew she’d convince herself to stop. She looked up when he lifted off her head, knowing she'd made a huge mistake starting this.
He kissed her hard. His hands unbuttoned her borrowed shirt to move all over her skin. She was losing herself to the feelings again. She had to stop this, not for herself, but for him. Someone had to save his soul. He’d never survive if she didn’t put an end to this, not with her death on the horizon. Shane didn’t seem like the kind of person to go into something like this without involving his whole soul.
Neither of us will survive if I don’t end this.
"Have you ever thought I’m only fucking you so there’s no way you’d let your brothers hurt me or let me reverse this curse since there’s a high risk doing so might hurt me?" The lie tasted bitter and cruel, but she needed to see the wounded look on his face. She needed to stop this before the option to stop was no longer there. Before stronger feelings took hold and they were wrapped tight in the insanity that would decimate one of them when the other died. Death of one of them was inevitable. Her. She thought he understood this.
"You’re not like that," he said. "You said so yourself. Neither of us are users."
Damn her and her honest words. She had trouble lying to Shane.
"How can you be sure?" She cocked her head. "I’m a witch. We’re notorious deceivers, right? You don’t really know me. You just think you do."
"I see you," he said in a tone that caused her more anguish than she ever thought possible. It was the kindness and empathy that undid her. It was the mercy despite everything that happened in their past.
"This is good that we got the attraction out of our systems," she forced out.
His eyes turned turbulent. "One time. Like you said."
After a quick nod she said, "Anything more is a mistake."
"It wasn’t a mistake." But he stepped away from her and reached into an overhead compartment. He patted around, emerging with a T-shirt and latex gloves. He handed her the shirt. "It’s for you. It's clean. Figured you’d want to get out of that. It reeks of that human."
She crushed the shirt to her chest while Shane stripped the vampire to his underwear.
"I'm not…" He shook his head. "Nope. That's as far as I go. I'm kind of surprised he's wearing briefs at all." He rewrapped Antonio in the blanket.
"Do we have to wait for him to wake up in order to pilot this plane?"
"I can pilot. I'll be a minute to dump his clothes outside. Then we'll get out of here."
"Where are we going?"
"An island in the Mediterranean that my mother owns. We'll meet my brothers there."
She changed into the new shirt and sat in a window seat to stare out into the gray day.
Shane paused at the top of the stairs when he re-entered. She sensed he watched her. But she didn’t look up. If she did, he’d know how much she wanted him. This was the way it had to be. Them denying their lust. The potential for them to grow anything stronger needed to be removed and shoved into the impossible category.
I can’t feel this for him. I won’t. It was sex and only that.
Her mind laughed at the lie.
