Page 63 of A Little Bit Reckless
And she was my bow.
I didn’t want to go there again. Icouldn’tbecause, if I did…
“I just want us to be friends again and for you to forgive me,” Bow said, pulling me close, and this was so not like Bow. Just like those kisses at Legacy House, this wasn’t like her. She was standing up and going for something she wanted. She was going for me, but she couldn’t fucking have me. Again, I had nothing to give her. She blinked hard over glassy eyes. “What do I have to do for you to forgive me?”
Something inside me broke when she fucking said that.It shatteredlike when she said she screwed some fucking dude. I thought it’d been Bru, but I wasn’t so sure now after his reaction when I approached him. In fact, he’d looked just as shocked as I felt the day she told me.
That day…
It was the day in my parents’ bathroom whereIfirst touchedher. Stick or not, I’d put hands on my buddy’s sister.
She didn’t wait…
Why do you care?
I didn’t care who Bow had been with. All I cared about was that she made a fool out of me. No one was allowed to touch her, but she figured out a way.
The thoughts were something all my sanity had to believe in. Anything else would make me face reality. I couldn’t forgive Rainbow Reed for what happened in the past, not really.
Because, if I did, I’d have to forgive myself.
“Everything okay?”
My throat worked at the sound of his voice. Bru’s deep baritone was behind me, the proximity intimate, close.
Bow’s reaction to Bru was similar to how it’d been to me when she saw me at the bottom of the stairs. Her face went up a million degrees of red. He put color in her cheeks, which was normally somethingIdid.
The growl was low in my chest, and I said nothing to Bru before forming a territorial hand on Bow’s hip. Again, no one was allowed to touch her, but this fucker had before.
You both did.
I refused to think about that shit, and the same went for turning around and looking at Bru. That dude constantly got me in my fucking head, and that wasn’t happening. I gripped Bow’s hand. “What do you want?”
“I wasn’t talking to you,” Bru said, and, not standing for that shit, I did turn around, which was a big fucking mistake. Bru filled out the entirety of his tux with his Superman body, the smooth black tapered in tight at his waist. He had a hand in his pocket and his sight was very much not on me. His eyes narrowed at Bow. “Are you all right?”
I didn’t like the way he was looking at her, likehewas her protector. I also didn’t like the wayIwas looking athim. I was noticing shit like how he may have looked like Superman in his tux but gave off just as much farm-boy energy as Clark Kent. He looked like him too, his dark hair slightly messy, tousled. Like he’d just been through a round in the sheets, and Ididn’tlike that. I didn’t want him having a date. I didn’t want anyone having their hands on him.
Either of them.
I had territorial feelings about both of them, and I couldn’t have any of that shit. It was too fucked up.Iwas too fucked up.
“I’m fine,” Bow said, and she let go of me before I could let go of her. I felt the draft between us immediately. She pushed back her wavy hair. It was still flawless even after all the dancing. She pointed toward the exit. “I’m just going to go to the bathroom. Freshen up a little.”
I noticed how I never answered her question about forgiving her, but she didn’t wait for me to give it. She just left, and the urge to follow her was instant.
Don’t.
I didn’t in the end, but that didn’t stop Bru. Of course, him and his Superman hero shit went after her.
“I’ll go with you. Well, escort you,” Bru said. He had her hand, and I heard him because we were in between songs. I also heard what she said to him in response.
“I’m okay. Enjoy the gala,” Bow said, and Bru truly looked conflicted as he stared at her gloved hand. My instinct was to go push them apart. That shit was incredibly bold in front of all our friends and family, in front ofThatcher,but thoughts drifted as I watched Bru touch Bow. Brumade metouch her at Legacy House, and it hadn’t been so bad when we both were. I’d come so hard between them both. The thoughts made me ill, but not because I didn’t like what happened that night, and that was so fucked up.
When Bru let go of Bow, I could breathe again. It was like I’d been holding my breath, just like I had earlier that night when shit went down between all three of us. Bru and I had been showing Squeak how to dance, and it hadn’t been a bad thing, our hands on her, his hands on her.
I put away the messed-up thoughts and stared at Bru and Bow longer than I should have. Standing there, Bru watched her cut through the crowd and ultimately through the door. There was so much longing in his eyes.
I needed to find Thatcher. Bru and I both had to stop this shit. It was only physical, and if I told myself that enough, I’d start to believe it. Iwouldbelieve it. I had no fucking choice.
