Page 73 of The Midnight Book Club
“Give him time,” Elinor said kindly.
They talked in hushed tones for a while longer, but Vronsky stayed in his self-imposed exile for the rest of the night.
43
Aureliahadafitfulsleep.Her recent conversations with Vronsky and Oliver played themselves over and over again in her mind.She finally got out of bed at half past seven, having tossed and turned for an hour.She took her time making breakfast, lingering over her coffee, and showering and dressing for the day, but eventually had to go downstairs to face the shop.Opening the door from the flat slowly, she half-expected to see everyone staring up at her from below.But, of course, it was well after sunrise and they were all safely back in their books.
By early afternoon, Aurelia had worked through her conversations with Vronsky and Oliver so many times that she was starting to blend them together in her mind.She hated the accusation that she was acting under Oliver’s direction rather than in Vronsky’s best interests.But she also had to admit that she did find Oliver intriguing.Vronsky hadn’t been entirely wrong about that.
After spending so much time in her head, Aurelia needed to get out.She rarely closed the shop for longer than it took to get lunch or a coffee during business hours, but she had the sudden idea to take off the rest of the afternoon.The shop had been quiet after a rush earlier in the day, so she had no customers or urgent business that couldn’t wait.Before she could change her mind, she walked to the door and locked it.Elated by her own daring, she stepped backward a few paces, looking out the windows and wondering what to do next.She began thinking about Antonia, Marigold, and her mother and father.Each of them would have told her to leave the shop for the day to get some air and perspective.
It wasn’t long before Aurelia had grabbed her coat and bag and was out the door.Much as she’d grown to love running the shop, it felt liberating to have a day off.She walked around the city, spontaneously went to a movie after noticing that she was just in time for the opening credits, and then went for dinner at a new restaurant she hadn’t tried before.But as she sat down to eat on her own, she realized that she could have called Kali or David to see if they were free, rather than spend the day by herself.She’d grown so used to being on her own in the evenings it hadn’t even occurred to her to have company.And if she’d called, she suspected they might have told her off—and with good reason—for finally wanting to do something at night.
By the time Aurelia got home, it was just before midnight.She hesitated at the door to the shop, knowing that if she wasn’t in by the time the clock struck the hour, she’d be able to avoid an awkward night of trying to clear the air with Vronsky.Her hesitation was short-lived, however, as she knew it would be better to face him rather than put it off another night.
Having gone upstairs to drop off her things, Aurelia was a few minutes late coming back down to the shop.As she walked through the door from the flat, she caught sight of Vronsky standing near the top of the spiral staircase and they each jumped in surprise at the sight of the other.It turned out to be the perfect way to break the tension between them.After laughing and taking a moment to recover, they walked over to the mezzanine railing and leaned against it, looking across the shop toward the square outside.
Aurelia started to speak, but Vronsky waved a hand and said, “Please, Aurelia, I have much to apologize for and wish to ease my conscience for my behavior toward you.”He heaved a sigh and continued.“I spoke in anger last night, saying things that were only partly true, and in some cases saying things that lacked any truth whatsoever.”He paused.“I do not wish to leave the shop.I do not wish to end this project we have begun.”Another pause.“My only wish is that we may carry it out aswesee best, absent the overtures of someone who does not know me or understand what I would make of my future.”
After taking a moment to choose her words, Aurelia said, “If you’re still interested in publishing your story, Alexei, then the editor”—she avoided mentioning Oliver by name—“will want us to make certain changes… certain revisions.”
Vronsky’s brow furrowed, and she rushed on, saying, “But I give you my word that I won’t let him make any significant changes without asking you first.”
“I shall assent to those terms,” he agreed with a nod.“The first significant change I must reject is the prospect of writing myself into a love affair or a marriage.I understand it would serve as intriguing fodder for a reader, but I cannot allow myself to once again have my heart set upon the page for all to see.”In a gentler tone he added, “I would find it difficult to set aside my love for Anna and consider a new ‘love interest’ as you say.”
“I understand.I’ll tell Oli—the editor—that I won’t write you into a relationship.If he says he won’t publish it… Well, then you and I can keep working on the book and we’ll try to find someone else.”
Aurelia knew it wouldn’t be easy to find another publisher, and that even if she did, they’d likely raise the same concerns as Oliver, but she pressed on.
“I want to apologize too.I know I upset you last night and brought back painful memories.Please know that was never my intention.”
Vronsky nodded solemnly, then asked, “I hope we may remain friends despite my rash words?I would regret losing such a devoted friend and ally.”
“Absolutely.Should we go downstairs and start working on a new chapter?”
“In fact, I thought we might converse with our friends this evening.I fear my behavior last night made the shop an unpleasant destination for many and I should like to make amends.”
A few hours later, Aurelia and Marianne were standing at the front of the shop talking to Elinor, who sat in the armchair that had recently been vacated by Fezz.
“He does seem more like himself this evening, does he not?”Elinor asked in a hushed tone.
Marianne and Aurelia turned their heads to look at Vronsky, who was across the shop speaking animatedly with Marmee.
“I know I ought not to speak of it, but I cannot help myself,” Marianne began guiltily.“Did I hear correctly last night that Count Vronsky suggested you might have developed a regard for the publishing man, Oliver?”
“Oh,” Aurelia said, blushing.“Yes, he did say that.”
“And?Did his statement reach its mark?”
“Marianne!”Elinor chided.
“It is only that I should like to think Aurelia might find her own happiness in love, as we have found ours,” Marianne said defensively.She turned back to Aurelia, adding, “What of this Oliver?What are his prospects?”
“His prospects?”The question made Aurelia feel like she’d been dropped into a conversation in Elinor and Marianne’s novel, but she managed not to laugh.“Well, he works in publishing, as you know.He’s very good—I read one of the books he edited.”
“He is not a gentleman of leisure, then?”Elinor sounded slightly concerned.
“No, those come few and far between in my time.”
