Page 14 of Ruin
6
LINGERIE EMPOWERS US
LILY
Annika studiesme with an incredulous expression as we wait for our appointments at the beauty therapy salon she’s brought me to. Tranquil music is playing from a hidden speaker in the dimly lit room that smells like lavender, and it’s all very relaxing. Or at least, I imagine that’s what they are going for. I’ve forgotten how to relax, so it’s just making me antsy.
“You’ve never had a facial? Never been to a place like this?” I can tell from her tone that she considers this to be some sort of crime.
I shrug. “I mean, I’ve had my eyebrows waxed. But no… When I was younger, I never really got into this sort of thing… And after I was married…” I don’t know how to explain how pathetic my existence has been for the last thirty-two years.
Especially not to someone as beautiful and sophisticated as Annika.
“Sebastian definitely did the right thing in asking me to be the one to make sure you are spoiled today. We’re not justgetting clothes. I’m going to give you a full makeover,” Annika says, bouncing happily in her seat.
“I don’t want to be a bother… Or to spend all Sebastian’s money,” I protest.
She scoffs. “You know he’s a freaking billionaire, right? I couldn’t come close to spending all his money in one day. Although I wouldn’t mind trying.” She grins, and it’s hard not to smile back.
After an hour in her presence, it’s obvious that Annika is a force of nature. She has barely stopped talking since she dragged me down to the garage and forced me into her cute little red convertible. Given I seem to have lost the ability to speak much, it was nice to have someone else to fill in the silence. It’s also kept me from stewing over Sebastian’s insistence that I can no longer hide away from the world.
Daniel had tried to get me to go out when he first brought me back to Dark Desires, but when I’d refused, he’d given in. He’s less confrontational than his brother, though. Sebastian calls the shots and people fall into line. It’s always been that way, and it seems like he’s become even more powerful in the years since we’ve seen each other. Everyone falls over themselves to please the charismatic man. I felt his presence surrounding me from the second I walked through those doors last night. Truth be told, I felt it in Sydney as well, but I was able to ignore it when he wasn’t there. But now that I’ve come face to face with him again, there’s no denying the magnetism of that man.
After two hours of pampering, I feel like a different person. The beauty therapist had the lightest touch, and once I’d grown used to being touched by a stranger, I found I enjoyed theexperience. She’d commented on how good my skin was, given my complete lack of a beauty routine.
“Just good genes, I guess,” I’d said with a shrug.
My mother had been a model before meeting my father and turning to prescription drugs to numb herself from the reality of being married to a domineering arsehole. I have her side of the family to thank for my youthful looks. Although sometimes that feels like more of a curse than anything else. When you’re considered beautiful in the world I come from, you’re seen only as a commodity to be used by those who want the best of everything.
Joseph had expected me to be made up at all times, so I know how to do my make-up, spending hours watching influencer videos to perfect it. But he’d seen no point in allowing me to do frivolous things like get a facial, and my skin care routine consists solely of soap and water, and a bit of moisturiser.
“Look at you! You’re glowing!” Annika exclaims when I rejoin her in the relaxation area after my treatment is finished.
They’d insisted we stay here and drink the hot apple infused tea they’d prepared for us.
Relaxation has become such a foreign concept that it feels strange sitting here doing nothing but drinking tea. I can feel myself start to fidget the longer we sit here, and Annika’s gaze drifts to my leg as it bounces uncontrollably.
“Not big on sitting still, huh?” she asks after a moment, sipping on her tea.
I force my leg to still. “No. Sorry.”
“No need to apologise. I’ll just finish my tea and we can hit the shops. I can’t wait to find you the most beautiful clothes. And we’ll hit the lingerie store, too.”
I stare at her for a moment. “Why do we need to go to the lingerie store?”
“Because every woman should feel sexy, and lingerie empowers us,” she replies with a shrug.
“No one is going to see my underwear.”
She laughs, shaking her head. “It’s not for anyone else. It’s about how it makes you feel. You are absolutely gorgeous, and I think it’s time you realised that.” Her tone is final, and I can tell there’s no point in arguing with her.
Like Sebastian, she is obviously used to people following her instructions. Perhaps that’s why I find her so interesting. She is the embodiment of confidence, and she oozes sensuality. I guess being ultra sexual is expected in her line of work, but I can’t imagine ever being that comfortable in my own skin.
Once Annika has finished her tea, I follow her out into the busy shopping centre and try not to let my discomfort show as I look around at the crowd. It’s the middle of the week, so I can only imagine how busy this place would be on a weekend. Even though I know I’m far away from Joseph’s reach, I can’t turn off the intense need to look for him or one of his staff at every turn. Within minutes, the relaxed feeling is completely gone, replaced once again by the anxiety that I know well.
Annika drags me into shop after shop, and after two hours of trying on countless clothes, we hit the lingerie store. She whirls around the racks, selecting several matching bras and underwear sets. It’s clear that not only does she have expensive taste, she also leans towards less conservative outfits than I’m used to. She’s made me try on several outfits that leave very little to the imagination. And she’d promptly bought each one, though thankfully we’d also got some more casual outfits as well.
Judging by the very revealing black lace bra and matching G-string she’s just thrust into my hands, it seems as though those tastes extend to underwear as well.
