Page 30 of Choosing Hope
Sophie’s suggestion that we offer Mum a few images of our choosing, taken by our own photographer, for Hello Magazine, was the final olive branch Mum needed to build bridges with her.
We left on a blissful honeymoon, not realizing the storm that was brewing at home.
Carlo waited for us to return to London after our honeymoon to announce that he was being transferred to the Rome hotel.
He observed me as he explained his reasoning. He feebly claimed to miss the heritage of his birthplace—which we were both aware was utter bullshit.
His departure seemed like the end of an era. If I’d believed his excuse, perhaps I’d have felt differently. But seeing him leave, knowing he’d be alone, hurt.
Perhaps because of my sadness, or maybe because of his own, Carlo solemnly promised he’d be home regularly; as Sophie and I held him on our last night together, it was a relief to hear he wasn’t severing our connection entirely.
Though when he returned to England a couple of weeks later and asked us to join him on the couch because he had an announcement, Sophie and I were both shocked to the core.
“Travis has invited me to go with him to a sex club this weekend,” he said.
Until this point, the three of us had been monogamous for over three years. Carlo abstained from having other partners. This wasn’t something we discussed, but perhaps because we didn’t use condoms together, Carlo never strayed.
Both Sophie and I sat staring at him.
My mind buzzed with a noise I couldn’t block out. Was this the end?
Sophie was the first to speak. “Why?”
He studied her for several moments, and I could see the torrent of emotions he was struggling to organize in his mind. He’d fallen in love with my wife, and he was doing everything he could to claw himself back to a place where he could keep control.
Carlo doesn’t fall in love easily, but when it happens, he’s loyal and it consumes his heart and soul.
“You guys are married now. I always understood that you’d eventually move on, I need to protect myself. A diversion will help,” he replied honestly.
The entire time he spoke, he stared at me, and I had the distinct impression that I’d let him down. When Chess was alive, he didn’t exclude me once. I never asked him to back off, but I had private thoughts about being alone with Sophie.
I could sense Sophie eyeing us, perhaps trying to interpret our silent conversation.
“Why a sex club?” she asked him.
“It’s anonymous. I don’t have to commit. It’s ideal for me,” he explained. “Travis has been a few times. He loves it down there. The way he describes it...fits my lifestyle.”
Carlo glanced back at me as I nibbled my bottom lip.
“Say something, Spencer. I won’t go if you’re uncomfortable with it.”
I shook my head; “It’s not my place to tell you what to do,” I replied, my voice so quiet I’m surprised he heard me.
How could I admit my curiosity to see him there?
Travis called me two days ago and asked me to go along. I automatically declined; being a married man. However, he never mentioned inviting Carlo.
“Do they have a website?” Sophie asked.
We both turned to glare at her. When she saw our questioning stares, she shrugged.
“It might be fun one night,” she teased, and my mouth fell open.
“You want to go to a sex club, Bella?” Carlo demanded, his lust augmenting with each syllable.
Her hand on the sofa cushion traced the faint lines in the fabric.
“Maybe. If you guys were with me.”
