Page 78 of A Subtle Scar
Charon released me, and I sat there between them and sipped my tea, made it salty with my silent tears, their magic wrapped around me. I did not resist it.
Chapter Twenty
Chandlerseemedhappyenoughwith sipping his tea, and happy enough with nibbling on a slice of what, to my mind, was the best pizza in all of Geneva. He was less confrontational now, and that calmed me right the fuck down because I had no idea what to do about an upset boyfriend.
The worst part was, Ronny seemed to have that covered, but I couldn’t very well drag him to a quiet corner to give me pointers, and if I texted Lucy, there was always the danger he thoughtIhad caused Chandler’s upset, and then, who knew what the Devil would do? Lucy could be really mean if he wanted to be.
I glanced down at Chandler. Ronny’s spell around our boyfriend was a warming one. That seemed unnecessary because it was a pretty nice day and I was always warm, but Ronny probably had his reasons. I frowned. Maybe the whole traveling slow and just chatting with humans without any end goal had taught him something.
Chandler’s hair was mussy, his face red, but his tears had stopped falling. That was good, wasn’t it? I exhaled and put my hand on his knee for some assurance, his as much as mine.
“Food is okay, baby?” I asked. We were sharing three pies, though I had barely managed to pick off the capers of the pieces for Ronny. I’d never understand what he hated about capers, but that just meant there was more for me.
“Sure,” Chandler said.
He sounded like he’d partied all night, his voice rough and strained, and he looked about as tired. I glanced over to Ronny, but he seemed unconcerned and happy to keep his mouth shut the one time I wanted someone to tell me exactly what I needed to do.
I went over the events of the day again. The policing in the morning had been fun, and I’d come to the conclusion I’d be good at it. Without me, they wouldn’t have found that spell at all. MaybeIcould be a part of Chandler’s crime solving team. While showering him with the attention a human ten like him demanded. And at night, he’d return my affections and praise me for all my hard work, and even Ronny would admire my skill in navigating human things. And not just Ronny, the Dragon Mother would also be impressed and askmeto do her gardening rather than Lucy.
But all of that had been derailed. I shoved half of a slice of pizza into my mouth and chewed while trying to imagine another Chandler. Twins were perfect doubles, weren’t they? There were few doppelgänger twins like that among gods, at least as far as I knew. Hypnos and Thanny came to mind, but Hypnos was an unbearable pain in the ass.
Chandler seemed very upset about having lost his double. I wouldn’t want someone who looked and thought exactly like me around. Then again, it was possible it wasn’t like that for humans. It was possible the loss was more like…I tried to imagine losing Ronny.
Ronny could be obnoxious, and he complained a lot. But him not being there would make me feel wrong. We didn’t hang out constantly, but every few years at least we came together. Well, since Trony had taken over Lucy’s party planning, we’d been seeing each other on a far more regular basis, and I always looked for Ronny at those parties. If he’d not show…
If I knew he’d not show because something had happened because some powerful god had stripped him of his godship for instance, and he’d died a human death before I could intervene, I would be very upset. Very, very upset. This whole thought experiment of Ronny not being there was upsetting, and I could fully imagine it.
“That hurts. Are you trying to hobble me now so I can’t leave you?” Chandler asked.
I pulled my hand off his knee. “No, baby, of course not. I’m sorry. I was just thinking—” I met Ronny’s eyes across Chandler’s head. No, I’d never want him not to be there. “It doesn’t matter what I was thinking. We’ll always be here for you, baby. Ronny and me. I don’t think there’s any magic that can fill up the space that’s been left empty when you lost your brother. I really wouldn’t try to make you replace him with things. Uhm. But…”
“I think what Hermes wants to say is, we are not what you lost. We are what you found,” Ronny said.
Yes, no one really got me like Ronny did. Maybe Chandler too, someday soon, but without Ronny…
I looked down at Chandler. “I’ll give you all my magic, baby. My soul too, if that were real. And the best blow—”
Ronny managed to ram his fucking heel into my big toe again.
“Fuck! Ronny! Well, baby, you get whatever you want. Always.”
“Yes, darling,” Ronny said.
Chandler glanced at me, not really making full eye contact. The blue of his eyes seemed brighter now, quite possibly due to the redness surrounding it.
“Forget this happened. I don’t get like this.” He sighed. Fuck, but he sounded exhausted, poor thing. I’d be exhausted if I had to miss Ronny all the time. If I couldn’t really get a good night’s sleep because of Ronny? I didn’t need to sleep, but I knew humans did. It had to be terrible for our boyfriend, having to go through all of that. “You were going to show me that spell,” Chandler said.
I almost expected him to push against Ronny’s and my magic all over again, but he didn’t. He just said the words, almost like he thought he had to, but didn’t really mean them.
“Darling, you’ve been on your feet for hours.” Ronny checked his watch.
Humans needed their rest, and too much work could have them collapse. On top of that, Chandler’s issues with finding sleep. It was afternoonish in Brunswick, and the sun here in Geneva was already changing the light to pastel evening colors. Chandler had worked since he’d fled the hotel room close after sunrise, so nine hours at least, maybe more.
“You are going to rest for now,” I decided.
“I don’t want to rest,” our boyfriend said.
Fuck. Did we just tie him down or what? I looked at Charon because I had no idea what the easiest solution was to forcing our boyfriend to let us take care of him.
